Some people just never learn about self-worth…especially clueless Penn alum like one Jordan Zucker. Despite four years of top-notch Philadelphian fraternal passion, Ms. Zucker has resorted to joining other P-college attendees, digging up her meals out of the fleshy, sour trash can of reality television by auditioning for Oprah Winfrey’s Search For the Next TV Star competition. Ms. Zucker aims her bottomless bimbo glasses of wine at the Oprah throne, and at best, splashes just a drop of incompetency on her royal toes. Her brilliant idea? A female-oriented sports-themed fantasy-football cooking Dr. Seussian nightmare. Rhymes aside (and multiple empty wine glasses, faux Bohemianism with a trophy guitar,cheesy beach backgrounds, etc.), her belief in her “experience” in television – which boils down to a guest screenshot on Scrubs and some DVRed Food Network special – leaves me wondering what concoctions of self-humiliation and self-illusion are brewed on Penn campus. Oh wait, I already know.
No offense, Jordan. But literally – No. Offense.