Lena Chen and the Case of the Naughty Nudie Pics

Lena Chen and the Case of the Naughty Nudie PicsIvyGate’s feelings toward Lena “I lowered my mouth over his cock and slid my lips over his shaft easily” Chen have been well-documented. Which is to say, she’s our best enemy, or maybe our worst frenemy, it’s hard to keep track. But there is one feeling we have toward Lena that is unequivocal: we don’t want to see her naked. But yesterday, we did. We also saw her getting railed by a guy with gnarly pubes and pasty thighs.

A “tipster” calling himself FUCKLENA posted thrice at 7:43PM on December 21:

[url redacted]

The 12-photo gallery featured four of Ms. Chen in the buff, one of which was taken from the angle of a blond-pubed man penetrating the “Bleeding Heart Nympho” vaginally. Another featured a pouting Chen pulling at the edge of her panties to reveal a tattoo we at first identified as a “flying penguin unfurling its penguin wings” (thanks, Hal), but upon further inspection recognized as a Claddagh ring, a traditional Irish wedding ring now popularized as a “promise ring” for the young and chaste.

We may be childish rumor-mongers here at IvyGate, but pornographers we are not. I instantly instant messaged Lena to get the scoop, and she reported that the blond pubes in question belong to “Sam,” a 35-year-old Penn grad student who is clearly more than a little messed up if he spends his free time trying to ruin a young co-ed’s reputation. Lena tells us she has been trying to ditch Sam for the last nine months (despite a November blog entry about him entitled “The Man I Could’ve Loved“) and is not at all surprised by the emergence of these pics. “This is actually a good thing,” she explains, “because now I can get a restraining order or something. … On the bright side, I think this qualifies as an excuse for me to get an extension on my term paper.”

After the jump, Lena’s surprisingly calm chat on the Ivy League lovers’ spat, and two carefully chosen and non-pornographic pics from the gallery.

UPDATE: IvyGate will return to a normal posting schedule on Jan 14. Enjoy the holidays/exams.

Lena Chen and the Case of the Naughty Nudie PicsAfter a brief email interaction in which Lena basically said “oh, great. It’s Sam. I’ve been waiting for this moment,” we moved to instant messaging, which I have edited here for length and clarity:

maureen: hey lena
maureen: it’s maureen
lenachen: hi
lenachen: thanks for letting me know about this!
maureen: so it was the ex from penn?
lenachen: there’s really only two instances in which a guy would have naked photos of me and one of those guys is my hs sweetheart who im seeing later tonight.
lenachen: i figure its the penn one
maureen: he (or someone he knows) sent it to us as an anonymous comment
lenachen: okay well, it was probably him
lenachen: he took the breakup reallly badly, which doesnt make sense bc he was twotiming me.
lenachen: he’s been trying to get me to talk to him for the past nine months or so
lenachen: and i think he finally got so pissed off that i wouldnt speak to him that he decided to do this.
maureen: holy shit. psychopath?
lenachen: this is actually kind of a good thing bcs i can probably seek a restraining order or something
lenachen: i mean, he never followed me. just a lot of persistent calls and IMs and some crazyyyy comments on my blog
maureen: you seem awfully calm for a stalked and exposed woman
lenachen: well, ive had a lot of practice?
lenachen: i had an actual stalker last spring
lenachen: so … yeah
maureen: maybe i should read your blog more. you have a horrifyingly dramatic life.
lenachen: on the bright side, i think this qualifies as an excuse for me to get an extension on my term paper
maureen: hmm. clearly, you are far more mature than I am. My immediate thought was “let’s find this motherfucker and castrate him”
lenachen: haha, yeahh i sent in a complaint to the website already
lenachen: im sure they can take it down
lenachen: i’m going to email some people who are more familiar with media law and see if there’s a way to make him pay legally

…and on the anonymous pornographer’s identity:

maureen: who is this guy anyway? did you ever blog about him?
lenachen: i did. he was “sam” on my blog. big charmer, total sociopath.
lenachen: had problems with compulsive lying and everything. a clinical narcissist
lenachen: that’s why i never let him apologize to me face to face.
lenachen: it wasnt that the breakup was bad bc i was mad at him; i just realized he was kind of crazy and not someone i wanted to have any contact with.
lenachen: when i went to philly a month ago, he left a nine minute vmail trying to convince me to talk to him
lenachen: he called me late at night a few times that weekend and i pretty much just ignored it
lenachen: havent heard from him since so maybe this is his way of getting back at me
maureen: ew… makes me sick

lenachen: i mean, the guy thrives on attention.
lenachen: and i dont understand why because he’s so OLD
lenachen: (He’s 35, told me he was 28)
maureen: wtf.
lenachen: he gets really ticked off when he doesnt get the response he wants but he’s also weirdly into celebrity
lenachen: like when i was seeing him, he’d ask me all the time to write about him
lenachen: which i just found ODD

Lena Chen and the Case of the Naughty Nudie Pics

Note to commenters: Anyone who links to pornography will be banned.

255 Responses to “Lena Chen and the Case of the Naughty Nudie Pics”

  1. Derp Says:

    I think I could’ve done without seeing that.

    I’m hardly a prude, it’s just that if naked pictures are going to be leaked I’d prefer them to be of attractive people. You know. Maybe if she had a bag over that pugface.

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