Why would the New York Times bother to do a story on your slightly unhelpful yet quasi altruistic non-profit tech start-up? Because your name is Joshua Kushner, your brother Jared owns the New York Observer, and the word "scion" can be applied to you, that's why.

It seems aside from pimping themselves out to a shady Mexican billionaire and music mogul David Geffen the Times is buttering up the Kushners for a loan by writing a 1,300 word profile on little bro Joshua's new pet project UniThrive. Besides being all jazzed that they might get some sweet Kushner cash, there was a fail. The reporter didn't even check out the microfinance group Kiva.org and the Times was forced to run a correction yesterday. That's just odd given UniThrive co-founder Tanuj Parikh is the cousin of Kiva's president.

Details and why begging is the new working after the jump.

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Apparently it's still 1934. Harvard cannot stand to have a poor, black, female student from Brooklyn wearing a cap and gown, let alone on its campus. That's according to Chanequa Campbell, whose lawyer claims Harvard prevented her from walking after tying her to the alleged murder that occurred in Kirkland house last May. She pulled a Kanye West to our collective Mike Myers a fortnight ago when she told the New York Post, "Harvard is doing this to me because I'm black, I'm poor and I'm from Brooklyn."

Okay. Right, it could be that Harvard might be more hesitant to pillory a student of a wealthy donor. It too seems possible she believes that because she is black the university is presuming her guilty whereas they might give white students the benefit of doubt. It appears she is not enjoying as much solidarity from the Harvard black community as she might like, though.

But what does Brooklyn have to do with anything? Everyone knows Harvard dislikes Staten Island much, much more. And Brooklyn is hot right now. There are plenty of rich kids living on daddy's money in Williamsburg who attend or attended Harvard.

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Sometime around 3 p.m. on Monday, May 25th, the Ivy League was about to take over the men's lacrosse world. Cornell had pulled off a shocking upset of top seed Virginia two days earlier in the national semifinals, and they were leading no. 2 Syracuse in the national championship game. The Orange had closed the gap from three goals to one in the final four minutes of the game, but with less than thirty seconds to go, the Big Red had the ball.

Meanwhile, with Cornell a few seconds away from their first national championship in lacrosse since 1977, Princeton's men's lacrosse team was looking to start a dynasty next year. Although the Tigers lost to Cornell in the quarterfinals this year, Hall of Fame coach Bill Tierney had everything set up to dominate the Ivy League and possibly the national stage. Princeton boasted the top freshman defenseman and goalie in the country in Chad Weidmaier and Tyler Fiorito, respectively. Tierney was sure to add to the 14 Ivy titles and maybe even the six NCAA titles he won in his 22 years with the Tigers. Things were looking bright for the Ancient Eight.

And then, the Fail Pandas appeared.

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Now that we're back for summertime fun, it seems like a good time to catch up on all the things we missed while seeing Star Trek 79 times. This is a first in a multi-part series making up for lost time. It will continue through the next few weeks or until Jared Kushner fires all of us, whichever comes first.

It's inevitable really. With the death of print imminent--and more importantly, a $3.2 million apartment that one can't not buy--the Harvard silver-spoon legacy and New York Observer publisher has been on a pink slip rampage. At the start of May, the Observer's cleaning lady got the boot. Then just over a week ago, a significant portion of the writing staff was axed. Amongst the casualties are former Gawker editor and Penn alum Doree Shafrir and Princeton eating club investigator and popular guy Spencer Morgan. But Jared Kushner's thirst for blood was not yet quenched. So last Thursday, he acquired the daily e-newsletter (and money vacuum) Very Short List and fired everyone there.

As for those who got the boot, you would think that Kushner with all his riches would be able to generously compensate his former employees. However, they're reportedly just getting the standard minimum of one week of severance pay per year of service. And that's because Jared Kushner has already pledged his massive wealth to those who are truly needy: Harvard students looking for loans.