If The Ivy League Hasn’t Already Destroyed Itself This Summer, Forbes Will

goodbyeWell we've come to that point in the summer where its time for the temporary IvyGate editors (Max and Michael, not that it matters) to say goodbye. It hasn't been a great season for the Ivy League though. Cornell lost everyone's social security numbers. Harvard is broke and is trying to own English. A Brown student and a Yale student competed to see who could be more annoying. Californians don't understand us. Don't even mention lacrosse. And we seem to be forgetting something. What could it be? Oh well, it probably wasn't important.

But the worst news of all came just this week. Forbes Magazine, the nation's premier experts on all things list-related, released their ranking of America's Best Colleges. Here are the sobering results:

1. Army

2. Princeton

3. Caltech

4. Williams

5. Harvard

6. Wellesley

7. Air Force

8. Amherst

9. Yale

10. Stanford

11. MIT

12. Swarthmore

13. Columbia

14. Centre

15. Haverford

...

...

...

Umm, it'll be a while until we reach the next Ivy League school, so we'll warp ahead after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »

This Binge Will Require Your Assistance

This Binge Will Require Your AssistanceAs summer's cruel countdown ticks to zero, we hope this finds you drunk and satisfied with the season. Morgan Stanley made you that offer; you squeezed every last kilometer out of that Eurail pass; and as for Johnny Castle -- you'll never see him again, but O summer love it was worth it.

It's all over now as Brown, Columbia, Penn and Yale trudge back to class this week, tan, rested, and still a little high. As for us, we spent our summer watching Rocky training montages on YouTube, shadowboxing and committing Ivy class presidents to memory.

Check in with us tomorrow at the crack of 10, when we kick things off in style. Probably by desperately begging you for tips. We crave information, people, and the gossip here is only as good as what you leak us. Email IvyGate@gmail.com! IM ivygateblog! We have, as this test run should have made abundantly clear, pretty low no standards.