Dartmouth student body presidential candidate John Nolan '10 got double busted for ass-kissing and bull-shitting on Friday. First Nolan criticized the current administration in last Wednesday's presidential debate, then wrote a long SSS (sorry so sloppy letter) right after -- only to have it printed in the D the very next day. Thank god for press-savvy 20-somethings and their impeccable knowledge of how and when to leak embarrassing information to the press. Especially after Nolan won't shut up about not getting any press coverage.

In some wording that's slightly above jungle gym talk, Nolan explained in an email to Bode and Assembly Vice President Nafeesa Remtilla ‘09:

“Yes, I could go about playing the likeable card, the approachable card, be a people pleaser, and smile and nod and maybe pull off some Sara [sic] Palin winks,” Nolan said in the e-mail. “But at the end of the day, if I do that, and I lose to [Vernon], I’m going to regret this experience.”

It gets better:

“When I tried to be politically correct, I didn’t get press coverage,” he wrote. “I need my name out there. I need the exposure. I need to make waves to win, and that’s all I’m doing.”

Everybody's new best friend, Nolan goes onto point out how he didn't really mean all those things he said, didn't want to do anything "dirty," and just wants to win win win. Way to break  rule number one of behind-closed-doors-dirty politics: Don't talk about dirty politics.

Given the fact that Dartmouth students have recently had some problems with sending regretable emails, we're starting to wonder if maybe Hanover shouldn't have electricity. At least Nolan (probably) didn't pull any race cards and will likely just lose and enjoy our awesome Google ranking for the rest of his political career.