And that editor is me. To the relief of most of you, I’m stepping down from my short-lived stint as an IvyGate 2.0 editor next week after accepting a new bloggy job that, you know, pays an income. I will maintain a loosely defined contributing editor’s role, meaning I won’t do shit but reserve the right to troll the tipbox for hilarious Spectator articles to make fun of every so often. Hal and Jacob will fill you in on however they plan to fill this tragic, heartbreaking loss, once they’ve stopped sobbing.
On another note, I’ll be embarking on my first and presumably last IvyGate road trip this weekend to cover the “Kill the Ivy League” thing at the New Yorker Festival. So if you’re going to either that or the Sasha Frere-Jones-hosted, Diplo-laced dance party this weekend, come and say hi! I have red hair, but no touchy.
Hal, Jacob and I are still new on the job, so what better time to get to know each other better! In an effort to increase transparency, I’m going to run through a quick demonstration of how we kill time on slow news days, such as today. Then it’s your turn to tell us something personal about you, then we’re BFFAE.
Content is always only a few keystrokes away. Follow this simple formula to be an asshole blogger:
1. Find something that is irritating and ubiquitous in the Ivy League. A capella!
2. What Ivy League school have you not written much about? Brown!
3. Find the point where (1) and (2) might intersect. YouTube!
4. Since every answer to (3) is YouTube, search (1) + (2) and click on one of the first four videos. “a capella brown,” e.g.
5. Post result of (4) to IvyGate. Spin that shit:
I really, really hate a capella. Now you know something about me!
It’s us: Hal Parker, Jacob Savage and Jim Newell. Regular readers may remember us from our summer guest editing stints. We offer them a truce.
We’re excited to be editors for infinity and will try to build off of Nick and Chris’ model. Big ups to them, of course. Thanks for trusting us with your baby. Nick and Chris still own things, but probably won’t show up unless we get sued >3.76 times a week.
Also, thanks to other summer guest editors and regular tipsters for maintaining the foundation these lazy last few months. We want to build up our contributor base in the next few months, so if you have any interest in getting involved please e-mail us at email@example.com.
This week we’ll be making fun of freshmen a lot, a lot a lot, for they are a curious breed. Send in your best stories from the first couple weeks of school involving freshmen iconoclasm. We will also have real things.
Looking forward to making new happy friends,
Hal Parker, Jacob Savage & Jim Newell