Typically I only tune into the ESPY Awards for the occasional hilarious sports-related skit and to see Seth Meyers completely tear apart professional athletes. This year, however, we’ve got some Ivy League representation to make things a bit more interesting. Cornell lacrosse player Rob Pannell is nominated for the “Best Male College Athlete” category, and it is certainly well-deserved: Pannell led the nation with a scoring average of 5.24 points per game, currently has a 52-game scoring streak (the longest current streak in the NCAA), and was named the USILA Player of the Year.
Pannell does face some stiff competition, though: Heisman Trophy winner and NCAA football champion, Cam Newton, NCAA Tournament Most Outstanding Player and basketball champion, Kemba Walker, and champion of the Mormons and white people everywhere, Jimmer “The Jimmer” Fredette. (There’s also a hockey player from Miami-Ohio … not really sure why they threw him in there.)
All of these guys (minus the hockey player) get round-the-clock media coverage from ESPN, making this a difficult task for our hero, Rob. Just take a look at the online poll in this Columbia Spectator article, where they ask readers, “Will Rob Pannell receive more than 5% of the vote?” This is the most depressing online poll I have ever seen.
Folks, we need to use the power of the Blogosphere and the Twitterverse to get Rob some votes. Head to the ESPYs website to cast your vote, and make sure to spread the word to your Ivy League brethren. Remember, a vote for Rob is not just a vote for the Ivy League and the sport of lacrosse, but also lax bros, upper-class suburbia, upper-class suburban lacrosse moms, and to extrapolate even further, the entire east coast of the United States.
Note: If Rob Pannell does somehow win this, I expect to be personally mentioned during his acceptance speech on live TV.