Today's Crimson featured a neat little open letter from Bradley Smith, founder of the Committee for the Open Debate on the Holocaust. Yep, it is exactly what it sounds like. A group that questions the existence of the Holocaust.

Bradley Smith, the founder of the organization that placed the ad, is a known Holocaust denier who has been identified for his hiding behind the veil of free speech in America. Here's his coolest quote:

I don't want to spend time with adults anymore. I want to go to students. They are superficial. They are empty vessels to be filled.

Really, economic times are hard—Harvard knows that—but the Crimson business board is really opening the flood gates with this one. Not only is the Harvard Hillel pretty serious about not ignoring Jewish history, but to be frank, their student body is pretty aware of the sensitivity of certain issues.

Seriously, the First Amendment is awesome, but would the Crimson might as well run a full page for the Imperial Klans of America on that campus. (Yeah, that's the real link. I'm on some sort of list now I think. Fuck you, Harvard Crimson Business Board for making me reckon with freedom of speech!)

After the jump, pictures of kittens. Because IvyGate was not built to deal with bigot-speak. But you can see the ad in context, too.

UPDATE: Max Child, President of the Harvard Crimson, published an apology. Evidently it was some sort of crazy accident. They even gave the ad money back to Mr. Hates-the-Jews. Nice cover-up, dude.

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Turns out all that tuition money Harvard kids shell out is for naught after all. Christian Flow, Harvard '10, recently wrote an article for Harvard Magazine on the university's apparent lackadaisical attitude at giving students an actual education. Based on a personal episode of academic buffoonery involving a flight back home to write a term paper in 24 hours, Flow highlights how professors at the number four douchiest college in America do everything but put their students in the time-out zone and put a hilariously inappropriate amount of effort in squeezing quality work out of their pupils.

In three years at college, I had never been slapped around like this. This was the kind of thing that happened in high school when you didn’t do your reading. Who knew that tenured professors had the time or the temperament for this species of intervention?

Expectedly, all the blame can be dumped on the Harvard Management Company. And as the college devises ways to prevent further whiny and self-entitled protests on student-life related budget cuts, it plans to reduce the number of teaching fellows hired this year, slash small seminars in favor of giant lectures, as well as phase out general examinations for certain honors concentrations.

After the jump, it turns out Ivy League professors don't actually give a shit how you do in their class. But various forms of B usually cut down on office hour interaction.

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On Wednesday night, Jon Stewart lampooned the MBA Oath established by a group of second-year students at Harvard Business School. Earlier, the Harvard Crimson reported that as a result of the financial apocalypse, Maxwell Anderson, now an HBA graduate, had drafted a Boy Scout-esque pledge, which was then signed by hundreds of fellow graduates. A few lines:

I will act with utmost integrity and pursue my work in an ethical manner.

I will safeguard the interests of my shareholders, co-workers, customers and the society in which we operate.

I will take responsibility for my actions, and I will represent the performance and risks of my enterprise accurately and honestly.

But this little tree-house word of honor didn't fly with many other future Kenneth Lays. In an interview with the Daily Show's John Oliver, Bruce Kogut, a business professor at Columbia, admitted that "not a very high percentage" of his students considered taking the oath. Oliver then spoke with a group of Harvard and MIT MBA students who found the oath contradictory to what they've been taught to "be responsible to shareholders." One guy commented, "I feel that ethics is a really fuzzy subject." When asked if she feared going to jail in the future for possibly using illegal profiting tactics, one Harvard student piped up with no reservations:

It's important to be a little bit of an asshole sometimes.

Scout's honor, indeed. See the video after the jump.

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You can label Lena Chen according to sex toy references all day long, but now she's going for something new: Donna Reed. The Ivy League's semi-retired sex blogger and current domestic goddess wannabe recently wrote about her new foray into the culinary arts in a "postcard from abroad" for the Harvard Crimson. Forgoing her typical narcissism for an apron-clad version, she writes:

I started cooking last year after I moved off-campus to live with my boyfriend, who has an actual kitchen and uses it to make exactly three varieties of salad. When I decided that it was time for us to incorporate heat into our kitchen regimen, my mother saw it as a long-awaited opportunity to instruct me in Chinese cooking.

In retribution for the New York Times calling her a "small Asian woman who ate every crumb of everything," Lena goes on to elaborate about acquiring the Chinese ingredients for her feast in a town of "exactly three Asian people." (She's evidently the go-to Geisha Girl even without the sex blog.) Turns out Germany isn't the best place to find bamboo shoots.

This all comes in  the midst of Elle's venture for self-improvement, which includes the regular shameless flaunting and calling everyone else fat.

But wait! Apparently, that orgasm isn't the only thing she's faked. Before the end, Chen admits to her guests that she found the recipe from a BBC cookbook, not dearest mommy. A-plus for effort on her final mother-daughter Lifetime-special moment:

I suppose my two-course Chinese feast turned out not to be much of a feast, or particularly Chinese, for that matter. But I think my mother would have nonetheless been proud.

Thanks for warming the cold, empty space where our hearts should be. Now bring us some steak, woman!

What with some members of Boston area police departments busy arresting innocent black professors, not apologizing, getting suspended for penning racist e-mails about said incident, and having beers with the President there doesn't seem to be much time left in the day to investigate the deadly shooting that occurred in May in Harvard's Kirkland House.

One suspect, Jabrai Copney, turned himself in shortly after the shooting, but it took the NYPD to bring in the other two alleged murderers. Blayn "Bliz" Jiggetts was arrested in June, and according to The Crimson they placed Jason Aquino under arrest on a Massachusetts warrant just yesterday.

Copney recently pled not guilty to all five charges he is facing in connection with the death of alleged Cambridge drug dealer Justin Cosby, who died shortly after what the Middlesex DA described as a failed drug robbery.  The other two suspects are in New York jail awaiting extradition. Case closed. The arrest scoreboard now stands at Cambridge police 0, NYPD 2, criminals 1, Harvard 1 expulsion. It's probably safe to say it hasn't been a good summer for the Cambridge police.

The recent shooting on Harvard's campus stinks like a drug deal gone bad, and there are text messages to prove it. A recent article in the Crimson, who have actually been kind of awesome in covering the scoop, details how text messages recovered from victim Justin Cosby's phone threw up some High Times red (green?) flags. A Harvard student, likely the asshole who landed Justin at the scene of the crime confirmed the suspicions.

The May 5 message appears to be directed specifically to students. “Happy cinco de mayo too all my peoples &congrats on another skool year behind,” it begins. “got some crazy jak herrer bud n some caliMIST best of the best and still those 50s.”

Yes, you non-Brown students. "jak herrer bud" and "caliMIST" refer to strains of marijuana. The text from April 20 provides more hints:

“This text goes too all my peoples happy 420,” it reads. “Im gud allday today just hit me up asap stuffs gunna b goin fast.”

An IvyGate executive meeting hours before these findings speculated that the shooting was clearly a drug deal gone bad. Justin Cosby was not a Harvard student and had no apparent connections with the Harvard community. The Kirkland House basement—read "ask no questions land"—also makes for a perfect swap spot. And the shooting? No brainer.

It should be noted that Justin Cosby, a graduate of Cambridge Rindge and Latin High School, succumbed to his injuries after the shooting Monday. His death is not funny. In fact, it's fairly terrifying.

So how 'bout those budget cuts for security, Harvard? After the jump, Harvard's response to IvyGate's pinpointing the effing irony.

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Before the sound of the TV news 'copters faded after the shooting at Harvard today, another student got almost stabbed outside of the Crimson building. The victim of the shooting was not a Harvard student, it turns out, but the knifepoint mugging victim definitely was. Already a day full of violence and irony, the story broke not on the Crimson's website but on the Quincy Open list:

yeah I was there I missed it by about 3 minutes on my walk back up plympton. i asked a cop. it was a mugging at knife point. they think they got the guy (yes he is arrested leaning against the wall on the street sitting on the ground) but I believe they don't have his knife so they're searching up and down the streets for it. there were cops all over the place. I counted between 7 and 10 cops on foot alone, not counting the 2 police vans, and 4 or 5 police cruisers.

Now, we can really abuse the word "irony." Ok, kids who are scared of walking around in the dark even through the well-lit, well-trafficked Harvard Square. You're validated. Alright, Harvard. Maybe the MBTA Police Academy is not the best place to recruit men to protect the future leaders of the world.

If Harvard kids keep getting taken down at this rate, we'll have to educate our next president at Dartmouth, where the crime is more hilarious than horrifying. Because everyone knows New Haven is in a state of perpetual gang warfare.

After the jump, read the full Quincy Open thread and the Kirkland House letter sent out by the house masters just a few minutes after the shooting earlier.

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The Harvard Crimson publicly launched  a new blog, Flybyblog.com about 5 minutes ago. Joining the ranks of Columbia's Bwog, Penn's Under the Button, etc., the daily's newest foray into Web 2.0 looks like it will provide some serious and relevant commentary for their respective student body. About, like books and how Allston residents hate Harvard and neat house t-shirt designs and OH MY GOD FREE COKE!

Buried among all the little gems of dweebery, FlyByBlog does indeed provide instructions—via official university publication The Harvard Gazette—on how to get free cocaine from Harvard doctors. Here you go:

Cocaine Usage Study: Researchers seek healthy men ages 21-35 who have used cocaine occasionally for a two-visit research study. Subjects will be administered cocaine and either flutamide or premarin and undergo an MRI and blood sampling. $425 compensation upon completion. Taxi is provided. (617) 855-2883, (617) 855-3293. Responses are confidential.

So, one more time. Subjects get cocaine. $425. And Harvard will pay for the cab ride? Well, it'd just be wrong to say anything against scientific research. But we should point out that FlyByBlog does think this is the "Best.Study.Ever."

Really. Do keep us posted, FlyBy. Got an 8:30 rez at Dorsia and would love to see you there.

Freeze Magazine, a year-old online magazine for college girls, recently opened the polls for their second annual Mr. Harvard Freshman contest. The magazine describes itself as the source for students "too old for Seventeen, but not yet ready to move onto Marie Claire," and the contest stays true to that. Though the contest page lacks last year's inclusion of boys playing bad guitar, there's more ammo for ridicule than you'd believe.

Avid Freeze readers might know the magazine best for the How to be Anorexic features or Why Boys Hate You columns, but the Mr. Freshman issue is the tops—despite Freeze's obvious rip-off of The Crimson's 15 Hottest Freshman. The contest itself is pretty simple. Apparently, a bunch of wannabe YM editors and future cougars make a list of their young crushes and let the world vote on the cutest of them all. In their own words:

We began our search for Harvard's most witty, kind, charming and attractive freshman males with a pool of over 700 males. Through a grueling selection process in which we narrowed these 700 down to just over 80 and then again to a group of 30, the final cuts were made and this group of 13 freshman males was chosen. In addition to being recognized as a Freeze Freshman, the Freeze Freshmen are the only men on campus eligible to compete for the title of Mr. Harvard Freshman.

The finalists received not only a free photo shoot and Adobe Creative Suite touch-up session but also a 100-word interview to say things they'll soon regret. Check out the highlights of said interviews à la Clint Eastwood and some laughable photos after the jump.

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Headached and frostbitten, Harvard students are still trying to figure out what went wrong. Another year of heightened party restrictions and generally pitiful party behavior in Cambridge proves once again that even though Harvard outscored Yale in The Game, Yale still scores more in general. Harvard kids managed to screw up their own pep rally by getting too rambunctious during a Girl Talk concert. To boot, Crimeds botched the 40-year-old Crimson-YDN pigskin challenge by failing to show up to the game. They even refused to open the doors of 14 Plympton St to let the Elis in for a drink.

The Crimson Crazies can blame the Boston Police Department for cutting this year's tailgate short, but the Girl Talk incident is unforgivably the fault of the fun-starved students who organized it. (Really, putting Greg Gillis on a flimsy stage with a PA system is like putting a hungry tiger in a preschool playground.) Meanwhile, the hope that ever-tightening restrictions in Boston and Cambridge might pull the focus back to the football also turns out to be a bit bogus. From the looks of it, there are just as many police officers on the field as gridiron giants. For all the buzz and hullaballoo, this year's 125th anniversary of The Game succeeds, yet again, in stirring more nostalgia than cocktails.

Check out some pictures from the festivities along with B-list celebrity gossip after the jump.

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