Phi Delta Theta’s unfortunate choice of Christmas card
Happy 2015, guys. Now that we’re collectively, if slowly, waking up from our post-holiday daze, it’s time to start getting back in touch with the crazy shit your peers got up to while you were sleeping. Ranging from deadly serious crimes to seriously unfunny jokes, here’s a taste of winter in the Ivy League. In order of descending gravity:
A Princeton graduate has been indicted for his father’s murder. Thomas Gilbert, P’09, allegedly killed his father, who was the founder of a hedge fund, by staging a suicide while his mother was out of the apartment (he got her to leave by asking her to buy him a sandwich). Gothamist claims that Gilbert Jr. – a 30 year old man – was provoked by a cut in his allowance from $600 to $400 a month.
The complaint filed by 23 Columbia and Barnard students back in April has finally been answered: Columbia University is officially under investigation for violations of Title IX and Title II. The lesser-known federal Title II deals with cases of discrimination based on ability, while 2014′s buzzword Title IX addresses equal treatment in regards to gender. Barnard College is under a separate Title IX investigation.
If you thought Dartmouth has been suspiciously quiet of embarrassing scandals lately, think again. 64 Dartmouth students have been charged with cheating in – get this – an Ethics class. Most of them will be suspended for a semester. More specifically, the class was a “sports ethics course targeted at student athletes struggling with academics.” We are sunbathing in the irony.
UPenn frat Phi Delta Theta decided to send out a digital Christmas card to spread holiday cheer this season. They also spread racism, since their card included a couple dozen white men plus a black female blow-up sex doll. The frat publicly apologized for the “act of poor judgement,” and insisted that the blow-up doll was supposed to be Beyonce, which of course no longer makes it the sexual objectification of a black woman anymore, since it’s Beyonce. Meanwhile, BroBible just didn’t get why everyone’s panties were in such a twist over the situation. Phi Delta Theta has since then been suspended.
To lighten things up, here are some photos from the 2015 “Men of the Vet School” Cornell calendar. “Great-looking men and adorable animals” apparently make for a “unique and special dynamic” in this photo series of shirtless guys parading around with puppies and tractors. Yep. Special.
And finally, a beleaguered young Princeton freshman is bravely calling out the microaggressions perpetrated against those who pronounce their “wh”s as “hw”s. For those who don’t know what we or he are talking about, think Family Guy’s “cool hwip.” Grassroots activism, y’all. (Sorry, is that a microaggression?)
Since 1799, TheDartmouth has prided itself on a long and illustrious history of professional student journalism and a commitment to ethical, objective reporting. In keeping with these standards, the newspaper published a correction to its October 17th front-page article that called for an end to the Greek system at the college. While it’s reassuring to know that the paper is upfront about its editorial errors, it’s less reassuring to hear that someone mixed up a potassium-rich fruit with a pretty high-tech sex toy:
Following the Isla Vista shooting this week, Jeff Sharlet, Dartmouth English prof (and author, Harper’s contributing editor, etc.) took to Twitter to discuss the tragic event. Like others, he linked Elliot Rodger’s shooting to the pervasive destructiveness of misogyny. Unlike others, he compared Rodger to sexual assailants at Dartmouth:
World of difference, but I think of Elliot Rodgers way I think of many of the young men who commit sexual violence at school where I teach.
We followed up with Sharlet for further explanation of the tweet’s idea, and he went in on both Rodger and rapists.
Rape and murder are different crimes, of course, but rape and Rodger’s decision to kill women seem to me likely rooted in the same pervasive misogyny, a sense of some or all women as less than human. I’m distressed by those who’d dismiss Rodger as nothing but a monstrous outlier. The logic of hate he took to its most extreme end is the same of that of the rapist, and, yes, of that of those who apologize for rapists.
“Dartmouth College – Happy,” uploaded Monday night to YouTube and already boasting 35,000 views, shows over 100 students dancing around campus to Pharrell’s “Happy.” We’re not making this up; take a look for yourself below.
Dartmouth has always been the problem child of the Ivy League, but President Hanlon’s summit last week on the “extreme behavior” plaguing the university is an unexpectedly candid admittance of the many toxic and harmful practices that characterize parts of student life on the Dartmouth campus. The school is notorious for its Greek life antics and threats of sexual violence on campus—the acquittal of Parker Gilbert, formerly D’16, now a former Dartmouth student, accused of raping a fellow classmate, has been the subject of nationwide media attention.
Ah, springtime at an Ivy: students descend on the quad, thesis writers emerge from their caves, and — best of all — high school seniors attack campus with naïveté, un-jaded excitement, and a myriad of questions all boiling down to: Can my host get me alcohol? Is this the school for me?
Columbia’s first Days on Campus program — prospective student visiting weekend — for the Class of 2018 began today. Prospies were treated with a beautiful spring day and blue and white balloons blanketing College Walk. But they’re also getting another dose of classic Columbia: protests.
After weeks of often extremely heated debate amongst students, Dartmouth College administrators finally released a statement responding to demands set out by the “Freedom Budget.”
“Diversity is one of the cornerstones of our academic community,” the statement, written by President Philip J. Hanlon and Interim Provost Martin Wybourne, (and as generic and vague as you can expect from college administrators) read. “We, as the administration, must engage in campus more effectively in current and future actions to achieve our shared vision for Dartmouth.”
IvyGate has been featured in the New York Times, Washington Post, Wall Street Journal, Los Angeles Times, Boston Globe, New York Observer, Newsweek, New Yorker, and other publications, as well as NBC, MSNBC, Fox News, Drudge Report, Gawker, The Huffington Post, Wonkette, Jezebel, The Awl, and many more. Most are horrified.