I was all set to write an update on the Princeton USG election (Weinberg/AEPi triumphs, nobody really cares) but then, wandering the Prince's website, I found this glorious gem, scans from a 1958 Princeton pamphlet entitled "Answers to Your Questions About the Admission of Princeton Sons."

At a time when desegregation was the all the rage and Stanford neared a 2:1 male-to-female ratio, Old Nassau whispered sweet nothings into nepotistic alumni's age-spotted ears: Worry not, ye rich and backwards-minded old people. Princeton holds your Y-chromosomed offspring to the absolute lowest of standards, now and forever!

And when it comes to low standards, boy, do those Princeton sons deliver:

Basically, this is a guide to George W. Bush's life.

"Princeton Sons" goes on to answer such troubling questions as "Why don't Princeton undergraduates look as glossy as they used to?" and "What about this business of 'geographical spread'?" the latter of which defends Lawrenceville grads against uncivilized cowboys from uncouth and farflung territories like (shudder) Texas. In a weird way, this too seems to be about George W. Bush's life.

The Prox has the whole pamphlet in its post, but we've got a very special IvyGate's Guide to Princeton's Legacy Admissions Guide, complete with PUSG tie-in, after the jump. Read the rest of this entry »

Today marks the final general voting day for Princeton's Undergraduate Student Government elections, where an alleged criminal runs unopposed for President, upholding Princeton's proud tradition of choosing the most offensively unfit humans possible for USG office. Soon-to-be-President Conor Diemand-Yauman stands accused of serving alcohol to minors, which, in the closed circuit of college life, is actually a campaign boon. In fact, it's his platform! The Prince explains,

As USG president his first priority will be to address the discrepancy between the two policies [statutory vs. university-wide drinking regulations] and general lack of clarity as to the consequences for students who decide to seek medical attention for friends in need. ... “If the way the Borough reacted to my situation is their typical response for all students, there is a definite problem, and I want to discuss this problem with them along with Princeton administrators to prevent possible consequences,” he said.

On the VP front, a shitstorm of 1AM emails and public call-outs have so thoroughly mucked the results that a re-vote has already been scheduled for later this week. It all started when, in a 1AM email to the entire student body, outgoing president Josh "Not Blackface" Weinstein endorsed his frat brother, Mike Weinberg, for VP. [ Pictured above: The brothers AEPi ] In the email, Weinstein said Weinberg was Diemand-Yauman's fav candidate, too. But then Die-Y sends an email saying he would never endorse Weinberg, which means Weinstein is a lying liar! So Weinstein sends another email apologizing, but Die-Y says it's not good enough, and then stuff gets really confusing, because everyone has the same two or three names. (Did you know the current VP's name is Mike W., too?)

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