College rivalries! Always exciting for the schools involved, but never of much interest to anyone else. And that’s fine, mostly. Then, one Saturday every November, Harvard and Yale meet for their annual contest, “The Game.” At that point, we brace for one massive, collective eye roll.

Elis and Cantabs never stop talking about that damn game. Which, like we said, would be all fine and well, except they’re so fucking annoying about it. “You’re the worst!” “No, you’re the worst!” “We invented Facebook, what have you done recently?” “Nice Harvard t-shirt, losers!” “We only admitted 6 percent of applicants last year.” Good grief.

Every year — from now until whatever Harvard-and-Yale-brokered oblivion we all ultimately face — we’re going to have to face the prospect of listening to those two groups of hyper-qualified idiots that make up the Harvard-Yale fan bases rub each others noses in their Mensa-scented bullshit. Such is life. And, such being the case, IvyGate has received an estimated 503,341 emails this week with links to soooper funny videos put together by the members of said institutions, making fun of said rivals. Well, fine. We’ll watch them. Are you happy now?

After the jump: Yale video = actually pretty funny. Harvard video = awful. Read on!  

Yale submission: “Harvard Still Sucks”

The Takeaway: Lots to chew on here. The producers of the video hit on a lot of different points, most of which were rendered pretty humorously: Harvard only cares about grad students. Harvard kids are lame. Everyone’s waaaaay too into the fact that they go to Harvard. (Those t-shirts!) Throw in an N. Gregory Mankiw joke here, an Adam Wheeler dig there. There was even a joke –which at first appeared to be at Cornell’s expense — that ultimately ended up being about how annoying the Harvard superiority complex is.

And, hey! Self-deprecating humor! Remember how awful that song was? What was its name? Right, “That’s Why I Chose to Down a Fistful of Klonopin.” They make fun of that, too. So, at least these kids aren’t above ribbing on their own school a little bit. We approve.

The point being: Not everything worked, and some of their jokes were certainly pot-kettle-black situations, but at least the producers of this video were trying. They were topical and incisive and, hey! They were actually pretty funny, too.

Now, none of that makes up for “That’s Why I Chose Yale.” Or “College Musical.” Or “Nothing Left Unsaid: The Towering Atrocity”  But baby steps, people.Too bad we can’t say the same for Harvard.

Harvard’s Submission: “Air Bully (Yale Sucks 2011)”

The Takeaway: ”Yale kids are dumb. And stupid. They can’t play football. God, how mother-fucking shitty-ass awful are they at fucking football, amirite? [The video features an abundance of totally gratuitous cursing, FYI.] Yale is soooooo bad at football that they probably think a bulldog (LOL) can play their shitty-ass version of the sport. So dumb.”

It’s not like there weren’t plenty of topical jabs this video could’ve taken. (Yale: The thinking man’s enclave of pernicious sexual advances.) But none of that here. No, no. We’ll stick with the puerile farts-and-cursing approach, thank you very much.

Still, I dunno. Lest we forget, this video was produced by student-comedy troupe “On Harvard Time” — so we should probably just be grateful they didn’t crack a joke at a dead girl’s expense again.