Cornell Student: Internet Bandwidth Is My Anti-Drug

MetaEzra reports that a Cristina Lara, a rising sophomore, is pushing against the University’s policy of capping internet bandwidth to 50 GB per month and charging heavy users for overconsumption of bandwidth.  She’s started a petition here and argues that “With a pricetag $57,000 per year, Cornell University should give it’s students unlimited internet usage.” All right, fair enough. But wait! There’s more. Lara’s petition goes one step further and makes a statement on Cornell’s social scene:

Cornell students in particular face a great deal of stress, and one of our outlets is to “surf the web”, read the news, watch movies, and make online purchases. By charging us for our internet usage, the Cornell University administration hinders our ability–and our willingness–to use the internet for recreational purposes.

If Cornell was situated in a major metropolitan area with a vast nightlife that could accomodate the interests of most, if not all, our undergraduates, then many Cornellians wouldn’t be so inclined to stay in their rooms and get on the internet. But that’s not the case. Cornell’s greek life dominates the social scene, making “nightlife” a dividing factor in the community.

Cornell students rely on the internet for recreational purposes, and are unwilling to pay the price for that any longer. While some students opt to partake in drug-related pastimes, other students stay in and watch movies, talk on Skype or iChat, or even just surf the web. We should not be penalized for this, and implore the Cornell University administration to completely eliminate it’s policy of charging students for the internet.


So let’s make sure we’re reading this right. Lara’s telling the administration that Cornell students desperately need bandwidth because 1) Ithaca is boring, 2) Cornell students are loaded with stress and need some private time with the intrawebs to blow these ‘loads’ 3) They would otherwise have nothing to do besides go to frat parties, and 4) DRUGS! YOU DON’T WANT US TO DO DRUGS, RIGHT?? RIGHT?

While we certainly support Lara’s goals, some of her peers have pointed out that it would take a continuous 2.3 month Skype call to pass 50 gigs. Given that, we think it’d have been easier to skip the attempt at social commentary, take the honest approach, and just say, “Some college students today such as myself are hopeless internet addicts who download massive amounts of shit, and a 50 GB bandwidth cap turns me into a shivering, pallid, teeth-chattering zombie who has no idea what to do with my life. I don’t know how to go out and play, but I do deserve a right to leave my Skype on at night so that I can sleep next to my long-distance boyfriend’s face. So don’t fine me for my somewhat sad existence. Please.”

Good luck to Ms. Lara, and here’s hopefully to many years of fruitful, healthy, unstressful, drug-free, and most of all, unlimited internet browsing on the school network. Keep us posted, girl.

  • Heather

    You would think with a $57,000 education she would learn to know the correct usage of the possessive form, “its.”

    • Arts and Sciences

      She’s in one of the state schools, she can’t help it.

      • Cornell A&S

        Exactly. Why Cornell doesn’t get rid of the state schools is beyond me.

        • BrianCardinalPick

          Hierarchy of Cornell colleges (undergraduate):

          Engineering
          A&S

          ILR

          AEM

          AG

          Hotel

          • Swill Spartacus

            Aap? Humec? Also aem is mostly massive douchebags.

    • BrianCardinalPick

      Also real quick – who do you think made the error? The girl who spoke it or the guy (aka Mr. Wilfred Chan) that wrote the article?  If it was Cristina, why didn’t Wilfred Chan add in a [sic] to let the audience know that the mistake was hers and not his? Either way, the fault lies with Mr. Chan here if you’re going to knitpick.

      • Anon

        If you check out her petition, it’s clear that Chan rewrote the quote verbatim.

        • BrianCardinalPick

          There’s still no [sic] in The Amazing Chan’s article. That was my only point. Sort of hypocritical to criticise someone for bad grammar whilst ignoring the poor writing of the writer. Just saying.

          • Anon

            [nitpick]nitpick[/nitpick]

  • 123

    stfu faggot

  • Roger

    Once Cornell slammed a $100 internet fee on my bursar. That definitely sucked ass and I’ve been limiting my internet use since (even though I think thats bullshit). 

  • scrubs

    I know the girl and she is the farthest thing from a non-partier…she is basically looking to defend fellow students and probably likes watching a lot of hulu or whatnot.

  • Anonymous

    Hey Cristina, why don’t you try turning off that computer, going outside, and getting some damn exercise instead of whining about a 50GB cap that nobody should have the free time to hit…  Work off the Freshman 15 you’re still carrying around on account of never doing anything besides watching streaming video whilst eating junk food.

    • Red Sullivan

      The way this entire conversation disintegrated into personal attacks, rape threats, racist undertones (I’m looking at you for those lats two, Brian Cardinal Pick) and basic immaturity astounds me. 

      • Red Sullivan

        *last two*

        • BrianCardinalPick

          Red Sullivan! Hi! You must be new here.

          There’s this thing in the English language known as hyperbole, fyi. Check it out. 

          A couple of things you should know. First, I would say that I’m pretty
          fucking good at it (English major in this bitch), seeing as how the post
          has been well received here (because it makes a semi-serious point in a
          blatantly hilarious manner). Secondly, I do this a lot. Did you follow
          CornellACB? If you didn’t, good for you – but ask your friends that did
          about Crepes Romanov.

          My rhetorical style and hyperbolic flourish are rather notorious. Part
          of that is because my prose is eminently recognizable (anyone even
          tangentially familiar with my work can pick up on one of my posts in a
          heartbeat). I also have a…different…sense of humor. Some people
          don’t find the notion of two notoriously endowed black men wearing spicy
          condoms fucking a rabies-infected and bee-ravaged gash amusing, and
          some do. The former are your decent people. The latter are your denizens
          of the internet (i.e. everyone else).

          Also, let me define “threat” for you.

          “I’m going to kick you in the nuts” is a threat.

          “I hope someone kicks you in the nuts” is not a threat. Perhaps a call to action, but not a threat. I believe that my proposed situation is so ridiculously outlandish that no one will try to emulate my proposed actions.

          I apologize if you took offense at my posts. However, I do not apologize for being offensive. This article was nothing more than a desperate reach by a mediocre-at-best writer to come across as witty and original; I merely took pains to point this out. If Mr. Chan’s tone in the article were not so smugly condescending (and if Cristina were not a close friend of mine), I would have let it slide. If Mr. Chan’s skin is so thin that he can’t endure some jabbing from a literate commenter, then he needs to find a new hobby.

          TL; DR: Welcome to the internet, Red Sullivan.

  • Anonymous

    Wtf is wrong with Cornell? They cant honestly talk about giving all students equal opportunity and providing resources to everybody while making students pay for the interwebz. 

    • Xer

      Cornell and course websites don’t count.  Only traffic that goes outside of Cornell.  Plus, if you go over, you can go to the library or computer lab and use a computer there.  This only really affects video mongrels and gamers.

      • BrianCardinalPick

        “Only affects video mongrels, gamers, and PEOPLE THAT BUY MOVIES AND MUSIC LEGALLY”

        FTFY

        Also video mongrels + gamers are probably around 35% of Cornell’s population, maybe more lol

        • Xer

          Do note I never implied that video mongrels are getting their videos illegally; you did that :P  And let’s be clear here – no one is going over NUBB just on buying music alone legally unless they’re buying over 5,000 songs a month if we assume a 10MB file (a pretty liberal estimate for file size).  Anyone who is buying that much music can afford to pay the NUBB charges they incur ^^

          On there being a large population of those types, perhaps, but most know how to use DC++ or library computers to get around things like NUBB.

          Personally, I don’t like NUBB much, but anyone having lived through the years of it being 5GB, 10GB, and 15GB, I can’t shake the feeling of the freshmen today being a bunch of babies for complaining about only 50GB.

  • Anonymous

    schumachiavelli you sound like this girl’s scorn ex boyfriend lol

  • BrianCardinalPick

    I’ve paid around $400 in bandwith fees in two years at Cornell. And before you jump on me for “being fat or antisocial and whatever”; I work out at least five times a week and I’m in a shitload of clubs here. And I can almost guar-an-tee I’m in better shape (or if you really keep after yourself, comparable shape) than most of you guys swinging your dicks around on here.

    Look, I didn’t have cable my freshman (15 GB cap) or sophomore (~20 GB cap) year. Now, what did I use internet for? Well, let’s see. Netflix, for one. Hulu, that’s another. Oh, and can’t forget Countdown and Rachel Maddow Show highlights. Then of course, there’s football and basketball games for the Cowboys and Mavericks. Oh, and certain Stars games. Oh, and certain Rangers games.

    And, of course, all that music and media that I LEGALLY PAY FOR on Itunes. If you’re on here tearing into Cristina while you download Watch the Throne on DC++, fuck you with a rusty morningstar covered in Africanized honeybees and capsacin extract; and I hope one of Michael Vick’s rabies-infested dogs ravages your genitals until they become an unrecognizable mass of infection. Then, I hope Mandingo and Patrick Ewing strut in and DP the ever-loving Christ out of your new mutilated gash after marinating their condoms in Thai chillie powder over a slow rotisserie.

    Where was I? Oh yeah. Anyway, all that’s before we even take into account the fact that I play videogames online. Games on Demand downloaded over Xbox Live are a good 6 GB right off the bat. HD movies? Knock off another gig right there. Starcraft II and HoN chew up bandwith (DotA 2 won’t be any better, I guarantee it), and Call of Duty for console? Forget about it – that there is a black hole.

    If I go out at night on a Thursday/Friday/Saturday/Sunday, I drink. All the time. If I stay in, I don’t drink (as much); since I’m probably jamming videogames or watching a movie.

    50GB is probably more than enough for me now (I don’t live on campus anymore, but whatever). I think this is more of a protest against the notion of bandwith caps in general, but still. Way to reach for the low-hanging fruit on this one, Mr. Wilfred Chan. Good to see you’re a fan of Cornell charging students for things like printing and gym memberships.

    • anonymous

      And thats how its done

  • Zrs6

    I’d just like to say that it’s almost impossible to go over the 50GB cap in one semester, like they said in the article it takes a 2.3 continuous skype chat to do so.  

    • Xer

      It’s a per month cap by the by.

  • http://twitter.com/brittersz Brittany

    For the record, the limit this past year was 20 GB (which is hard to go over with regular use, but possible.  Certainly not possible with ONLY Skype calls).  The limit was 5 GB in 07/08, 10 in 08/09, 15 in 09/10 and 20 in 10/11.  50 GB will start to be the limit this fall.

    • Xer

      Should mentioned that before the 2008-2009 school year, RedRover didn’t count towards it.

      • http://twitter.com/brittersz Brittany

        Also true.

  • http://twitter.com/moni1234 moni1234

    Well I think bandwidth caps are ridiculous.  They have them at my school also-a public ivy.  College tuition is expensive enough and continuously rising.  At least schools can provide the technology for their students to survive the stress of school.  It’s ironic that school are forever increasing their tuition but that students stay quiet and don’t demand more services in exchange for rising tuition.  For the cost of the tuition we pay, we should be eating 4 star meals off of gold plates, instead we’re lucky if we get hamburgers that taste worse than Micky D’s, good times….

    • just asking

      wtf is a public ivy?

      • Xer

        A phrase used by people counseling themselves about going to a non-Ivy school.

        I kid…somewhat…

  • Ezra456

    ivygate gets worse and worse…. why don’t you guys just highlight situations that you think are obnoxious/funny/interesting and let the readers decide without pushing it so far? You’re grasping so hard at any possibility of a quip or jab that you’re overlooking everything else that goes into making a decent blog post.

  • blackhawks jersey

    It really a useful idea.I will have a tiral of this idea as soon as possible as have already frustrated by burberry dresses and burberry men for a long time.Thank you very much for your continously post of effective tips.It really do me a great favor.if you have more information about burberry online shop can you tell me and i also like hermes bags,my boyfriend want me to buy wholesale replica Handbags but i can’t find a shop that sell replica hermes,as i always want to be a burberry women before and i search burberry outlet online for a long time, but i only get the result of burberry purse,then i Walk into marketing and marketing center, to find hermes sale,and i find a good display of hermes Handbags and hermes birkin bags, my sister want me to buy new burberry but i only find replica burberry it really drive me crazy!you know, next month i will marry with my boyfriend and i want to look some tiffany co jewelry and tiffany engagement rings, i search tiffany outlet shop for a long time they are all replica tiffany, so if you find good tiffanys jewelry and pandora jewellery or pandora jewellery beads also cheap nfl jerseys or jersey supply and religion jeans, you can leave a email to me! thank you! Hermes Scarf Hermes Scarves burberry coats nike air max 2011white air maxnike griffey max burberry sweater burberry woolscarf true religions jeans true religion jeans outletbears jersey blackhawks jerseyken griffey shoes
    air griffey max
    ken griffey jr shoes
    air griffey max 2

  • blackhawks jersey

    It really a useful idea.I will have a tiral of this idea as soon as possible as have already frustrated by burberry dresses and burberry men for a long time.Thank you very much for your continously post of effective tips.It really do me a great favor.if you have more information about burberry online shop can you tell me and i also like hermes bags,my boyfriend want me to buy wholesale replica Handbags but i can’t find a shop that sell replica hermes,as i always want to be a burberry women before and i search burberry outlet online for a long time, but i only get the result of burberry purse,then i Walk into marketing and marketing center, to find hermes sale,and i find a good display of hermes Handbags and hermes birkin bags, my sister want me to buy new burberry but i only find replica burberry it really drive me crazy!you know, next month i will marry with my boyfriend and i want to look some tiffany co jewelry and tiffany engagement rings, i search tiffany outlet shop for a long time they are all replica tiffany, so if you find good tiffanys jewelry and pandora jewellery or pandora jewellery beads also cheap nfl jerseys or jersey supply and religion jeans, you can leave a email to me! thank you! Hermes Scarf Hermes Scarves burberry coats nike air max 2011white air maxnike griffey max burberry sweater burberry woolscarf true religions jeans true religion jeans outletbears jersey blackhawks jerseyken griffey shoes
    air griffey max
    ken griffey jr shoes
    air griffey max 2

  • blackhawks jersey

    It really a useful idea.I will have a tiral of this idea as soon as possible as have already frustrated by burberry dresses and burberry men for a long time.Thank you very much for your continously post of effective tips.It really do me a great favor.if you have more information about burberry online shop can you tell me and i also like hermes bags,my boyfriend want me to buy wholesale replica Handbags but i can’t find a shop that sell replica hermes,as i always want to be a burberry women before and i search burberry outlet online for a long time, but i only get the result of burberry purse,then i Walk into marketing and marketing center, to find hermes sale,and i find a good display of hermes Handbags and hermes birkin bags, my sister want me to buy new burberry but i only find replica burberry it really drive me crazy!you know, next month i will marry with my boyfriend and i want to look some tiffany co jewelry and tiffany engagement rings, i search tiffany outlet shop for a long time they are all replica tiffany, so if you find good tiffanys jewelry and pandora jewellery or pandora jewellery beads also cheap nfl jerseys or jersey supply and religion jeans, you can leave a email to me! thank you! Hermes Scarf Hermes Scarves burberry coats nike air max 2011white air maxnike griffey max burberry sweater burberry woolscarf true religions jeans true religion jeans outletbears jersey blackhawks jerseyken griffey shoes
    air griffey max
    ken griffey jr shoes
    air griffey max 2

  • blackhawks jersey

    It really a useful idea.I will have a tiral of this idea as soon as possible as have already frustrated by burberry dresses and burberry men for a long time.Thank you very much for your continously post of effective tips.It really do me a great favor.if you have more information about burberry online shop can you tell me and i also like hermes bags,my boyfriend want me to buy wholesale replica Handbags but i can’t find a shop that sell replica hermes,as i always want to be a burberry women before and i search burberry outlet online for a long time, but i only get the result of burberry purse,then i Walk into marketing and marketing center, to find hermes sale,and i find a good display of hermes Handbags and hermes birkin bags, my sister want me to buy new burberry but i only find replica burberry it really drive me crazy!you know, next month i will marry with my boyfriend and i want to look some tiffany co jewelry and tiffany engagement rings, i search tiffany outlet shop for a long time they are all replica tiffany, so if you find good tiffanys jewelry and pandora jewellery or pandora jewellery beads also cheap nfl jerseys or jersey supply and religion jeans, you can leave a email to me! thank you! Hermes Scarf Hermes Scarves burberry coats nike air max 2011white air maxnike griffey max burberry sweater burberry woolscarf true religions jeans true religion jeans outletbears jersey blackhawks jerseyken griffey shoes
    air griffey max
    ken griffey jr shoes
    air griffey max 2

  • CornellSucks

    It’s Cornell…they have an english motto.  Who cares?