BREAKING: Rumpus Releases Yale’s 50 Most Beautiful (Sneak Pic and Full List)
Yale’s cruelest and least copy-edited “publication,” Rumpus, just dropped its trademark issue: the much-heralded and uber-nepotistic Yale’s 50 Most Beautiful. And inexplicably, there are 52 people on it. (Oh, and the cover mistakenly advertises 49, see below.) The rarely published and never fact-checked gossip rag also alludes to the exploits of a certain promiscuous “Cock Goblin,” public masturbation in Zeta, and more “truths they couldn’t prove.” Hot off the presses!
But don’t kid yourselves, you tasteless pamphleteers; we’re here for 50 Most. Best ways to get in? Know/hookup with Rumpus staff, make a public fool of oneself, (check, check) be a twin… or be beautiful, too, we guess. IvyGate’s got the list, and the balls to fact-check (stay-tuned).
Stats: The hottest Residential College is Davenport (mine, baby), with nine beautiful people, and the worst represented, Ezra Stiles, with a measly two. There are 11 freshmen, 12 sophomores, 18 juniors, and 11 seniors.
The actual hotness of these snarkily profiled folks is soon TBD. For now, feast your eyes on Movement for Beauty and Justice founder and professional airhead Justine Kolata, who made the issue alongside an exploited and confused horse above. After the jump: the full 50 Most list.
(Photo courtesy of Miranda Lewis, list graciously compiled by Joe Satran)
(in order of appearance)
Women
Celia Stockwell DC’11
Kelsey Gustafson MC’11
Olympia Arco SY’11
Eve King TD’11
Raffi Friedman TC’12
Liz Cui SM’12
Blaire Belling SY’11
Tanya Mayer BK’11
Dara Dickson ES’12
Steph Colanttonio SY’10
Lizzy Nadai JE’10
Rebecca Distler DC’12
Emmy Picket CC’12
Farah Al-Qasimi TC’12
Niki Sri-Kumar CC’11
Bray Ketchum DC’11
Chandler Benet BR’13
Teresa Benet BR’13
Anya Cekauskas BR’13
Lindsey Williams DC’11
Loren Olson BR’12
Courtney Grafton DC’12
Justine Kolata MC’12
Emily Ambrose BR’10
Rachel Schiff SM’10
Jackie Delligatti SM’11
Men
Bob Jeffery BR’11
Conor Youngblood DC’12
Dominique Fenton BK ‘10
Bear Handlon BK ‘10
Grant Goodlin PC’10
Nick Marcic DC’13
Derek Johnson JE’11
Peter Spaulding TC’13
Jake Conway DC’11
Colin Adamo PC’10
Jordan Raybould BK’10
Mert Altinok PC’13
Emre Altinok PC’13
Freddy Ketchum DC’13
Chad Costello TD’11
Henry Gottfried JE’13
Reggie Willwhite MC’12
Tom Mante BK’10
Cole Yeager SM’13
Brad Rose CC’11
TJ Smith ES’10
Alfonso Costa PC’11
Charles Holmes CC’13
Pat Witt JE’12
Nick Rugoff BR’11
Nicolas Niarchos TC’11
March 3rd, 2010 at 10:13 pm
I present Alex Klein’s Last Ten IvyGate Posts: (1) Yale; (2) Yale; (3) Princeton; (4) Middlebury mistaken for Yale; (5) Yale; (6) Dartmouth; (7) IvyGate (8) Yale; (9) Yale; (10) Yale. Let’s just go ahead and rename this blog: “Alex Klein Links to the YDN.”
March 3rd, 2010 at 5:13 pm
I present Alex Klein’s Last Ten IvyGate Posts: (1) Yale; (2) Yale; (3) Princeton; (4) Middlebury mistaken for Yale; (5) Yale; (6) Dartmouth; (7) IvyGate (8) Yale; (9) Yale; (10) Yale. Let’s just go ahead and rename this blog: “Alex Klein Links to the YDN.”
March 3rd, 2010 at 11:00 pm
The ethnic composition of this list is interesting.
March 3rd, 2010 at 6:00 pm
The ethnic composition of this list is interesting.
March 4th, 2010 at 12:42 am
Shocker… Alex Klein goes to Yale. Big deal.
March 3rd, 2010 at 7:42 pm
Shocker… Alex Klein goes to Yale. Big deal.
March 4th, 2010 at 2:00 am
Not a cover mistake, Alex. There are 6 ADPhi brothers in 50 Most this year but Alfonso Costa isn’t in the cover pic.
March 3rd, 2010 at 9:00 pm
Not a cover mistake, Alex. There are 6 ADPhi brothers in 50 Most this year but Alfonso Costa isn’t in the cover pic.
March 4th, 2010 at 2:27 am
isn’t tj smith in stiles?
head count for stiles = 2 :D
March 3rd, 2010 at 9:27 pm
isn’t tj smith in stiles?
head count for stiles = 2 :D
March 4th, 2010 at 4:10 am
Is Rumpus going to put this up on it’s website???? It hasn’t been updated since April 09. Can someone post a pdf??
March 3rd, 2010 at 11:10 pm
Is Rumpus going to put this up on it’s website???? It hasn’t been updated since April 09. Can someone post a pdf??
March 4th, 2010 at 7:00 am
@Reason:
you’re right, I guess there are even less minorities at yale then I thought :( But good list, once again we prove that Yalies can be the epitomy of douchyness
March 4th, 2010 at 2:00 am
@Reason:
you’re right, I guess there are even less minorities at yale then I thought :( But good list, once again we prove that Yalies can be the epitomy of douchyness
March 4th, 2010 at 7:21 am
first of all – the Cock Goblin and zeta bro are not myths. everything in Rumpus Rumpus is always true. also, the twin/couple ones count as ‘one’ profile… because often they weren’t beautiful enough to get in on their own, and the COMBINED beauty made their fortune. (this is totally excepting Jackie and Nick, who are both gorgeous.) that’s part of the number discrepancy, and as an earlier commenter said, Fonz isn’t on the cover.
March 4th, 2010 at 2:21 am
first of all – the Cock Goblin and zeta bro are not myths. everything in Rumpus Rumpus is always true. also, the twin/couple ones count as ‘one’ profile… because often they weren’t beautiful enough to get in on their own, and the COMBINED beauty made their fortune. (this is totally excepting Jackie and Nick, who are both gorgeous.) that’s part of the number discrepancy, and as an earlier commenter said, Fonz isn’t on the cover.
March 4th, 2010 at 6:45 pm
aww Jackie and Nick are so cute
March 4th, 2010 at 1:45 pm
aww Jackie and Nick are so cute
March 4th, 2010 at 8:29 pm
Another reason NOT to adhere to the pathetic, nepotistic requirements of a blindingly white campus full of trust-fund-suckers and future-golddiggers. Wow, I’m sure Mommy and Daddy would be so proud.
March 4th, 2010 at 3:29 pm
Another reason NOT to adhere to the pathetic, nepotistic requirements of a blindingly white campus full of trust-fund-suckers and future-golddiggers. Wow, I’m sure Mommy and Daddy would be so proud.
March 9th, 2010 at 9:18 am
No Asian boys? Really, Rumpus?
March 9th, 2010 at 4:18 am
No Asian boys? Really, Rumpus?
February 11th, 2011 at 2:40 am
Way to single out Justine… jerk.