“Pocket-Sized Pundit” Applies Early-Early-Decision to Ivy League, May Be Enough of a Tool to Get In

Creepy child-man Jonathan Krohn goes on the record with The Daily Beast as to which college he wants to attend. Guess where a 14-year-old conservative “pundit” thinks is cool! (Hint: not Brown!)

Jonathan has his heart set on Princeton for college, where he’d be able to do radio from New York, he says, and then shuttle back for class. He’s particularly drawn to the conservative Christian professor, Robert P. George, who teaches there.

Ooh, we can’t wait for Krohn to pledge an eating club–and to find out the Frists are  vacuous. People do realize that 14-year-olds are literally incapable of holding political opinions that are not either in agreement with or as rejection of their parents’, correct? And that maybe, besides the initial spectacle of someone who hasn’t yet hit puberty writing a book called Defining Conservatism, that, um, someone is buying the “business cards” and signing the permission slips for missed days of middle school? Yep, Jonathan Krohn is the product of a stage mom, one Marla Krohn, who says:

A lot of people have trouble understanding how a 14 year old could know more about the issues than they do.

Congratulations and welcome to the Ivy League in advance, Jonathan! You’ll fit in just fine.

  • pton09

    It’s very sad that his parents are robbing him not just of a childhood, but of the chance to think for himself and develop his own opinions. This kid is going to have a pretty messed up life.

  • pton09

    It’s very sad that his parents are robbing him not just of a childhood, but of the chance to think for himself and develop his own opinions. This kid is going to have a pretty messed up life.

  • http://peebleslab.com/ Pton

    Don’t worry peeps, he’s not in yet. There’s still hope!

  • http://peebleslab.com/ Pton

    Don’t worry peeps, he’s not in yet. There’s still hope!

  • H 10

    Seriously, does anyone want to sit next to or live with a 15 year old kid who can’t even legally look at porn? I add- can’t legally look at porn for 3 years! The only good thing is Princeton’s admissions office likely won’t fall for this stupid, promotional shit. Than again, they did let Michael Bay come on campus for Transformers 2…

  • H 10

    Seriously, does anyone want to sit next to or live with a 15 year old kid who can’t even legally look at porn? I add- can’t legally look at porn for 3 years! The only good thing is Princeton’s admissions office likely won’t fall for this stupid, promotional shit. Than again, they did let Michael Bay come on campus for Transformers 2…

  • H 10

    I’m sorry, I still can’t get over this. How much would it suck to get into Princeton, and then find out you’re living with a 15 year old little puke who can only recite his parents ultra-conservative beliefs rather than craft ones of his own?

  • H 10

    I’m sorry, I still can’t get over this. How much would it suck to get into Princeton, and then find out you’re living with a 15 year old little puke who can only recite his parents ultra-conservative beliefs rather than craft ones of his own?

  • Daniel D'Addario

    @H 10: I think he wants to go to Princeton when he’s of age, not at age 15. The rest stands, however!

  • Daniel D'Addario

    @H 10: I think he wants to go to Princeton when he’s of age, not at age 15. The rest stands, however!

  • chaosakita

    I hope he enjoys sex-toy handouts there.

    @H10: When did being underage stop anyone?

  • chaosakita

    I hope he enjoys sex-toy handouts there.

    @H10: When did being underage stop anyone?

  • Cool-umbia ’08

    H 10, Transformers 2 also filmed at Penn.

  • Cool-umbia ’08

    H 10, Transformers 2 also filmed at Penn.

  • Incorrect

    When I was 14 I was very far to the right and my parents were not political at all. Then I realized that being emotionally invested in politics is a waste of time and I stopped thinking about politics almost completely.
    Also, politics is stupid, especially compared to math.

  • Incorrect

    When I was 14 I was very far to the right and my parents were not political at all. Then I realized that being emotionally invested in politics is a waste of time and I stopped thinking about politics almost completely.
    Also, politics is stupid, especially compared to math.

  • 503

    It’s ‘bicker’ an eating club, NOT pledge an eating club. Come on, IvyGate…

  • 503

    It’s ‘bicker’ an eating club, NOT pledge an eating club. Come on, IvyGate…

  • minerva

    Making a personal attack on the Frist family in a totally unrelated post is totally inappropriate, even if the statement were true. I would imagine you have not met any of the Frists, so how about you keep your unjustified statements to yourself.

  • minerva

    Making a personal attack on the Frist family in a totally unrelated post is totally inappropriate, even if the statement were true. I would imagine you have not met any of the Frists, so how about you keep your unjustified statements to yourself.

  • Yes

    I never met balloon boy’s parents either. Doesn’t mean they’re not shit-fucks, dear.

  • Yes

    I never met balloon boy’s parents either. Doesn’t mean they’re not shit-fucks, dear.

  • ’12

    First, you don’t “pledge” an eating club. Second, the only one he could get into would be Tower, where all the tools reside. Third, Bryan Frist is an awesome dude, even though I only know him as the VP of the eating club I “pledged”.

  • ’12

    First, you don’t “pledge” an eating club. Second, the only one he could get into would be Tower, where all the tools reside. Third, Bryan Frist is an awesome dude, even though I only know him as the VP of the eating club I “pledged”.

  • Violinplayer12

    Wow. I envy you. Im only in 7th grade, I’d die if I was accepted into Princeton.

    Well, better study up for SAT and ACT when the time comes.