Jessica Alba Visits Yale Secret Society, Members Panic and Leak Pictures from Inside the Hall

jessica-alba-cash-warren-01-second-floor-march-28-2009-125th-anniversary-of-wolfs-headFantastic Four star and teenage boy fantasy Jessica Alba recently made a visit to suddenly very hip Wolf’s Head Society. According to a tipster, husband and “budding producer” Cash Warren ’01 brought her along for some elite treats out of plastic cups, weird games with sleepy-time masks, and photo ops. We can thank the latter for a peek inside the Hall (and Alba’s see-through dress).

While you can find pictures of Jessica Alba in any Maxim magazine, the shots inside of the Hall rank a bit higher than bathroom reading. But just a bit. There’s a framed picture of a letter to Yale President Richard Levin—that looks exactly as you’d expect a framed picture of a letter to look. Props to the photog for nailing that William Eggleston look in the boardroom shot. And the basement, well, it has that Yale feel to it: dark, Gothic, always morally bankrupt.

***Note: Stuffed wolf body but stuffed cougar (yes, it’s a cougar) head? What gives?

Here’s the part where everyone’s an investigatory journalist. What was the stripper wearing in the eye-mask scene??? From the expression on LBD girl in the background (center-left) who looks like a Looney Tunes die-hard, it’s probably an Elmer Fudd kind of thing—floppy hat, bell end gun, and accompanying insinuations—and she’s just recognized the speech impediment. Dude next to her recognized it, too.

After the jump, photos inside the Wolf’s Head Society and some surprisingly trustworthy captions about what’s actually happening in them.

president-levins-refusal-to-former-president-benno-schmidts-invitation-to-come-to-125th-anniversary-of-wolfs-head

Invitation to WHS 125th Anniversary Celebration to President Richard Levin from former Yale President Benno Schmidt.

basement_wolfs-head

Basement of Wolf’s Head Society. Note the quality of taxidermy (It’s high. Trust me. I’m from Tennessee.)

meeting-room-may-14-2009-wolfs-head1

Wolf’s Head Society Meeting Room. Note dramatic shadows.

the-initiation-april-16-2009-tap-night-for-wolfs-head-class-of-2010

This picture came from Tap Night, April 16, 2009. If it’s not the promise of a stripper these Yale juniors are grinning at, it’s the promise of a wealthy, privileged future they didn’t earn.

jessica-alba-cash-warren-01-second-floor-march-28-2009-125th-anniversary-of-wolfs-head

Jessica Alba, Cash No-last-name-needed, and some Elis during a visit from the Hollywooders on March 28, 2009.

  • Yale Old Guard

    @ dragoon – A great deal of the problem these days is that the younger generation of WASPs don’t attach the same value to an Ivy education as they once did. (I.e. they are the ones eschewing the schools in the first place.)

  • Yale Old Guard

    @ dragoon – A great deal of the problem these days is that the younger generation of WASPs don’t attach the same value to an Ivy education as they once did. (I.e. they are the ones eschewing the schools in the first place.)

  • Yale Old Guard

    @ dragoon – A great deal of the problem these days is that the younger generation of WASPs don’t attach the same value to an Ivy education as they once did. (I.e. they are the ones eschewing the schools in the first place.)

  • Yale Old Guard

    @ dragoon – A great deal of the problem these days is that the younger generation of WASPs don’t attach the same value to an Ivy education as they once did. (I.e. they are the ones eschewing the schools in the first place.) In many ways, we are a dying breed.

  • Yale Old Guard

    @ dragoon – A great deal of the problem these days is that the younger generation of WASPs don’t attach the same value to an Ivy education as they once did. (I.e. they are the ones eschewing the schools in the first place.) In many ways, we are a dying breed.

  • Yale Old Guard

    @ dragoon – A great deal of the problem these days is that the younger generation of WASPs don’t attach the same value to an Ivy education as they once did. (I.e. they are the ones eschewing the schools in the first place.) In many ways, we are a dying breed.

  • @Veritas

    emma watson actually was a straight A student for the record. and is she going to Brown for sure?

    btw, you’re an embarrassment to Yalies with comments like that. you clearly didn’t get tapped for anything, and you’re bitter about it. I know two people who got tapped this year, and they’re both upstanding, hard-working leaders— and not white, might I add.

  • @Veritas

    emma watson actually was a straight A student for the record. and is she going to Brown for sure?

    btw, you’re an embarrassment to Yalies with comments like that. you clearly didn’t get tapped for anything, and you’re bitter about it. I know two people who got tapped this year, and they’re both upstanding, hard-working leaders— and not white, might I add.

  • @Veritas

    emma watson actually was a straight A student for the record. and is she going to Brown for sure?

    btw, you’re an embarrassment to Yalies with comments like that. you clearly didn’t get tapped for anything, and you’re bitter about it. I know two people who got tapped this year, and they’re both upstanding, hard-working leaders— and not white, might I add.

  • I am anonymous

    …the highly anticipated second installment of Ivygate’s “tool” series.

  • I am anonymous

    …the highly anticipated second installment of Ivygate’s “tool” series.

  • I am anonymous

    …the highly anticipated second installment of Ivygate’s “tool” series.

  • W.H.S. 80

    Dragoon lacks flame and intelligence.

  • W.H.S. 80

    Dragoon lacks flame and intelligence.

  • W.H.S. 80

    Dragoon lacks flame and intelligence.

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