How To Get Into An Ivy League School: A Step-by-Step Guide Featuring Testimony From a Real, Live Silver-Spoon Legacy and a Racial Minority!

42-17432509IvyGate’s Guide to Admissions: Part II

Getting into an Ivy League school can be likened to winning the lottery: Pencil in a bunch of scantron bubbles, cross your fingers, pray to be struck by lightning. But instead of winning millions, you’re rolling the dice for the opportunity to impoverish your parents. (Or ruin your credit rating, or both!) Nevertheless, aspiring Ivy is a time-honored American pursuit, and no matter how improbable, impractical, and ultimately unpleasant the prize may be, thousands attempt it every year. Mostly, we do it for the free t-shirts.

What follows is IvyGate’s foolproof, guaranteed, 100%-success-or-your-money-back step-by-step guide to swindling your way into the school of your dreams.* Be warned: It isn’t always pretty, and a few of these steps (#3, section ii, second option) might make you go to hell.

1. Have perfect SAT scores, an off-the-chart GPA, amazing extracurriculars, leadership positions in everything, and the ability to leap tall buildings in a single bound. Duh. This one is a given, a prereq, if you will. Even the richest kid in the world won’t get in if he’s apt to flunk (or, more likely, drop) out.

2. Be from an insanely wealthy and/or well-connected family, preferably one with an Ivy League legacy. Apply early. While legacy admission standards aren’t as hilariously low as they used to be, a study by Princeton SOC professors Espenshade and Chung equates legacy status with a 160-point SAT boost (on a 1600-point scale) to the privileged few who definitely need it least. But that’s not what we’re talking about here. To guarantee admission, you need to be the child of a major donor, the kind who write seven-digit checks to their alma mater and have buildings named after them. One such Ivy Leaguer, the grandson of a prominent university trustee, told us about his admissions process, starting with an unconventional and star-studded campus tour:

my grandad flew to meet my dad & i [at the university], and i just figured that it was going to be a regular day of tours & walking around. however, when we got there we were met by a super friendly admissions guy. he took us on the regular tour, but then we ditched it because he said “it’s completely useless” (ironic, considering how much energy & money the university pumps into those tours) he took me around campus, and then brought me to meet a representative from the most popular department at the school, which i claimed to be interested in it. (later, i realized that he was one of the senior professors and chair of the undergraduate program) then they shuttled me over to the president’s office. i didn’t really GET that it was the president until they told me after we met. the meeting was brief, but looking back, it was quite an unbelievable opportunity. after lunch, we wandered around campus with another admissions rep, who told me all about undergraduate life.

After the jump: Anonymous Silver-Spooner (ASS) (Don’t be mad, ASS! We tease because we love/hate) continues his story and we offer five more tips for getting in.

As for his literal, ink-on-paper application, it was the same as anyone else’s:

[my grandfather] was definitely noted as an alumnus on my application – but not in any special way, just in that box where they ask you to denote any alumni relations. i submitted my application via Registered Mail (like everyone else…to make sure it got there), so there were no special addresses or markings on it.

This fits accounts from the Daily Beast’s admissions-side account. The admissions officer received ASS’s application was probably already familiar with his name, and knew to flag his app for whatever special treatment the Dean of Admissions prescribed. Would ASS have gotten in without his trustee grandpop?

i mean duh… there is no question that my connection helped me out. (i remember being worried at the time, but but looking back it was like “why was i ever for a SECOND concerned about not getting that ‘YES!’ letter?”) at the same time, i don’t think my grades & sat scores could’ve prevented me from getting in.
ASS reports little special treatment post-admissions:
i don’t think i really had any special treatment once i got in (living in [shitty dorm] freshman year really drives home that point) i think the only ‘special’ thing was that my adviser was eventually switched to the guy who chaired the department that i was, at the time, interested in. however, he was so useless that i would say that he made me a lot less interested in pursuing that path – i ended up choosing a totally opposite major.

3. Exploit your minority status, hide your white background, avoid being Asian.
Espenshade and Chung estimate a 230-point boost for African-Americans, 185 points for Hispanics, a 50-point deducation for Asian-Americans, and nothing for Whitey. Currently, the Common App allows students to self-identify multiple races or none at all; thus, the following guidelines:
  • i. Non-Asian Minorities: List your race in the section provided for it and devote at least one essay to race-related “grappling.” If possible, join an organization (preferrably a charitable one!) that focuses on your ethnic background and/or related backgrounds: Not only does this allow you to bring up your race more than once, it’ll help with all that grappling! Since you’re an Ivy-aspiring young’un, you should already be introspective and caring enough to do these things on your own. But if you’re among the dispassionately aggressive multitude that manages to take every Ivy League class by storm, you’ll be wise enough to fake it.
  • ii. White folk: You have two options. The first option is to be honest, check off the “White/Caucasian” bubble, and move on. The second option might make you go to hell, but if you want to go to Harvard, you’re probably into fiery torture, anyway. So: Fudge the truth. This could mean checking off the “Other” bubble. (Race is a social construct! We’re all “out of Africa,” anyway!) Alternately, you could take advantage of that one great-great-grandmother who might have been part Iroquois because she had the most gorgeous cheekbones. We spoke to a white, US-born child of Apartheid-era South Africans who identified himself as “African-American” on his application. No word on whether it ever came up. Of course, we’ll never know if it mattered, or if he got in on merit.
  • iii. Asians: You’re screwed. It’s not the negative-50 SAT points that will get you, it’s the nebulous world of underhanded anti-Asian discrimination that upper education can’t quite shake, of late. Part I of our guide saw an admissions officer snorting at “another Asian math genius with no personality.” This time, let’s try the account of a Yale student from the West Coast:
My interviewer complimented me as a breath of fresh air because he sees a lot of really smart Asian fellows come in with absolutely no personality, who just do well in school, and he laments that they don’t seem to have lives outside of school, making for really boring interviews. The funny thing is that I was pretty much exactly that throughout high school (except of Mexican heritage), but he just happened to catch all the wrong, “not-an-academic-recluse” signals from me.

While interviews are generally irrelevant (see #4) the sentiment is startlingly pervasive. Asians who want to beat the odds can decline to name their race, but it’s not like they won’t notice if your name is, say, Jian Li. If you feel like going to hell, try the fudging techniques listed in section ii. (As a mixed-Asian girl with a white name, I should probably note that race denial can turn its subjects into depressed, addled un-people and probably isn’t worth it. Then again, the sandblast of time may have dulled my memory of how it feels to be a desperately ambitious, upwardly-mobile eighteen-year-old, so my risk/reward calculus could be off.)


4. Know that your alumni interview is meaningless.
Did you really think Admissions cares about the opinion of some old guy who blathers about his roles in the campus comedy troupe and how much ass he got in college? Alumni interviews serve two purposes:
  • 1. Weed out total psychos (so avoid brandishing lethal objects and keep that theory about being the second coming of Jesus to yourself)
  • 2. Keep alumni enthusiastically involved (and paying their dues) in Alumni Clubs
In theory, an exceptionally glowing review could make a difference. In practice, alumni interviewers always give glowing reviews, because people who voluntarily spend their free time querying high school seniors about their hopes and dreams are also the ones who find stories about your high school debate team utterly fascinating. They think everyone and their three-legged dogs would benefit from a Cornell education. They’re like The X-Files: They want to believe.

5. Pimp your athletic skills, especially in sports that barely exist outside of upper education (crew, we’re looking at you). Apply early.
Espenshade and Chung estimate a 200-point SAT bonus to recruited athletes, which is roughly the same as Insider Higher Ed’s recent data on non-Ivy universities’ athletic admissions. Once admitted, you don’t even have to stay on the team—admissions are “merit-based” and financial aid is “need-based,” which means they can’t take away your admission or funding should you cut and run halfway through preseason training. A former varsity rower tells us recruitment is an easy game to play:

recruitment’s honestly a joke. i became a serious recruit at both brown and dartmouth just by emailing the coach. otherwise, coaches catch onto people at national regattas or whatever, but for the most part, smaller sports like crew are pretty easy to get recruited for if you’re any good at all and have the academics to back you up. i was recruited at dartmouth, brown, harvard, and colgate. i also reached out to yale and princeton but they didn’t seem too interested.

You might have to apply early, though. An article in yesterday’s The Dartmouth notes

“Coaches have a roster that they have to fill, so if you apply early, they know months in advance who they are getting and what positions they still need to fill,” Lauren Goodnow ‘12, a recruited track athlete said. “When I had recruits staying with me, they were all pressured to apply early decision.”

Recruited athletes make up 30 to 35 percent of the students admitted early decision to Dartmouth, according to Parish. Also, 18 to 19 percent of each incoming class are recruited athletes.


6. The Un-Legacy: First-generation college students as trendy new minority?
A growing interest in first-generation college students has reached the Ivy League: Brown, Cornell and Dartmouth recently added special resources for first-generation students, which means admissions awareness must also be increasing. From an admissions standpoint, first-generation students are attractive: They are likely quite self-motivated and parental education tends to correspond with socioeconomic status, which is among the many statuses Ivy League universities claim to care about these days. (Of course, the easiest way to quantify socioeconomic status would be to plug in everyone’s financial aid applications backwards, but for many reasons, some of which could—maybe—be related to step #2, they don’t do this.)
If anyone successfully completes all six tasks—you’d have to be the athletic and supremely intelligent offspring of a mega-philanthropic Ivy League graduate and a person who didn’t go to college, at least one of whom is a non-Asian minority, who has no qualms about exploiting his/her background and disregarding the kind words of aging alumni—you are officially the most powerful human in America, and we respectfully request to marry you. (Come to think of it, did we just describe Barack Obama?)

* IvyGate in no way endorses or accepts responsibility for applicants who take any of this advice, especially if they actually get into an Ivy League school, in which case they will likely spend the next four years of their lives in a self-hating funk, surviving on nothing but coffee, stale beer, and stress.

  • GoingForTheImpossible

    I find this post absolutely wonderful(even though it didn’t exactly help me the way I wanted)
    It was entertaining and I think it made good points somewhere along the way. Coming from a person searching to get into an Ivy school, that will, most likely, drain me of life and humor, I find it nice to get a good laugh before condemning myself to this quest.

  • 6packabs

    this is brilliant. all of the advice is exceptional and seems like it will be very useful. JK I’M NOT A FUCKING RETARD. GET A LIFE MAUREEN!

  • elder

    It’s so sad that so many high school students’ lives are dominated by doing things they think will get them into a certain college, and not by doing what they’re passionate about. In my (probably idealistic) opinion, I think if you find something you like, are somewhat talented, and work really hard at it, that’s what colleges will find attractive.

    To say that anyone who excels at math has no personality, whether or not they are Asian, is just silly. Maybe it’s because I love and am great at math, but most of the interesting conversations I’ve had in my life were with people who excel at math, logic and probability in particular. In addition, math skills are required for SO MANY fields. Of course, you need them for math, sciences and engineering fields. In addition, they are good for business, medicine, law, etc. If there are schools that honestly don’t want a math genius – who is truly a math genius – they are the ones being stupid. Why would you want to go to that school? If you are good at math and like it – you should do math!! To decide to not do math, just because you are Asian and don’t want to appear to be a racial stereotype to colleges – is just silly.

    On the other hand, as a high school math teacher at a public, magnet high school, I’ve seen many kids study constantly until they finally achieve that perfect 2400 SAT score, or at least an 800 in math. The perfect scores are not always from the students I would predict (from their performance in class). This score – on its own – does not mean the student is a “math genius,” especially in this day and age when it seems everyone who can afford one is getting their child an SAT tutor. So, I could see why colleges might prefer an applicant who spent their time playing a varsity sport, or worked hard and overcame impossible odds, to someone who spent every free minute maximizing their standardized test scores (scores which, I am pretty sure, were initially meant to measure potential, not to measure how well you study and/or how good your tutor was.) If a student truly is a “math genius” there will usually be other evidence (besides SAT scores), and I’m betting Ivy League colleges will accept them whether or not they are Asian.

    When I was in high school I honestly made no decisions in an effort to get into colleges (except maybe for playing basketball . . . ). I got C’s in the classes I didn’t really enjoy (history and French), excelled in the classes I did enjoy (English, art, math, physics), joined clubs based on my interests (math and physics) and chose extra-curricular activities based on my passions (computer programming over the summer and art classes in NYC on the weekends.) My standardized test scores were also really good.

    I got in to, attended, did really well at, and enjoyed my days at MIT. Now I am sure that there weren’t tons of white, female applicants with test scores and letters of recommendation depicting a talent in math, physics and computer programming (I liked, but was not great at art ;). I guess if I was an Asian male with the same application, I probably wouldn’t have gotten in. And I guess that’s unfair, but I honestly don’t think even the Asian males would want to go to a college that was completely filled with Asian males. But I digress . . . my point is MIT was a great school for me and I do think there is something to be said for having faith that if you work hard at what you enjoy you will end up at a place that is good for you. And if you are very talented and intelligent (and assuming what you enjoy isn’t watching TV or playing video games), the place that is good for you may be an Ivy League (or MIT or another really good school).

    Now I guess, if your life’s goal is to make money, and you believe that attending an Ivy League school is the first step on the road to get you there, you would be willing to do anything you can to get to an Ivy League. And maybe some people think that they can’t live without the prestige that supposedly comes with attending an Ivy League. And I’ll admit, being an MIT alum (and having an otherwise useless – to me – PhD in engineering) has opened some doors. But if you are a person who would have done well in an Ivy League had you gotten in, but didn’t get in because of random bad luck, I honestly believe that your life will be very similar to what it “would have been.” For instance, if you are someone who is good at schmoozing and making connections (and have the intelligence and work ethic needed to get great grades and scores) you will probably make a ton of money, even if you don’t go to an Ivy League. If you are like me, and suck at anything vaguely business-related, chances are you won’t end up making a ton of money even if you go to MIT (or an Ivy League). As far as the prestige, I know when you are in high school, in college, and maybe for a little while after college, where you will go/go/went to college seems like the ultimate definition of who you are. But honestly, for most of us, after a little while it ends up being just a place where you spent four years of your life. It’s honestly no more or less important than any other four-year phase of your life. If you are 40 years old and still consider your four-year stint at Harvard to be the most accurate and/or complimentary explanation of “who you are,” that’s pretty sad.

    If your parents don’t have a ton of money, especially if you intent to go to grad school, (and it seems this is required more and more), it almost seems silly to spend so much money on a private undergraduate education when the only thing people are really going to care about is where you went to grad school and specifically what you did while you were there.

    It just seems sad to me that high school students would work so hard at things that don’t interest them only to get into a college which perhaps isn’t a great fit just so they can continue studying things they don’t enjoy and then ultimately graduate and get a job they don’t love. Is this really preferable to falling into a racial stereotype doing the things you love? I think the take-home message should be to work hard and get good grades in high school, but also try out tons of activities, find one or a few that you love, work really hard at them, and accomplish great things. If you communicate all that you’ve done, learned and what you want to do and learn on your college applications, I think that more often than not the college that’s right for you will accept you. Like I said, I’m an idealist.

    • Swapnasatya Satya

      yeah i agree .there is no point in doing something just because it gets us going and ending up as the monarch of trash ville which we would very much like to destroy than to possess .by the way i am an idealist as well

  • Jenny.G

    Just to let the person who wrote this crap know, what you wrote is extremely discriminating and very rude. I am half-asian, half-american and I feel really offended. Don’t write about something that you don’t know about.

  • Lady Lust!?

    Asians with no personality you say?
    Well I’ll show you some freaking personality.
    And if your slow as fuck and haven’t gathered that I’m Asian, go see a doctor.

    I dye my hair to different colors just to make myself stand out.
    Currently, my favorite color is red,
    And guess what color my hair is.. RED!
    I’m not trying to change who I am as I person.
    I’m proud to be Asian.
    I can make the meanest teacher in the world crake a smile with my attitude,
    And I get straight A’s easily.
    My friends and I are as close as a messed up combined body.
    In the end we are basically one person.
    I bicker with my friends for my amusement.
    I play with guys feeling because it’s fun.
    I enjoy patronizing the male population.
    I double dare you to say that I have no personality again.

    I swear I will hunt you down and kill you if you do.
    Now.. Have a nice day!

    ~Jaynee

    • OnceInALifetime

      Jaynee,

      You certainly have personality: childish and annoying.

    • Neil

      Jaynee, 

      This is great. You are getting there. Keep trying and you might just fit. 

  • Lady Lust!?

    Asians with no personality you say?
    Well I’ll show you some freaking personality.
    And if your slow as fuck and haven’t gathered that I’m Asian, go see a doctor.

    I dye my hair to different colors just to make myself stand out.
    Currently, my favorite color is red,
    And guess what color my hair is.. RED!
    I’m not trying to change who I am as I person.
    I’m proud to be Asian.
    I can make the meanest teacher in the world crake a smile with my attitude,
    And I get straight A’s easily.
    My friends and I are as close as a messed up combined body.
    In the end we are basically one person.
    I bicker with my friends for my amusement.
    I play with guys feeling because it’s fun.
    I enjoy patronizing the male population.
    I double dare you to say that I have no personality again.

    I swear I will hunt you down and kill you if you do.
    Now.. Have a nice day!

    ~Jaynee

  • Fatimahalyas

    what if your pakistani? what category would you put that under?

  • Cheezdawg

    bloody paki grow a dick

  • comment

    I think people who try to be atypical and go against the stereotype are the ones with no personality. If you do have personality, you will just go for what you are passionate about. Besides, the stereotype in the United States only apply for Asian-Americans (just for the record). I was not born in the United States, but I do live here now, and real Asians (meaning, Asians who are in Asia) are not like the stereotypical Asians here. However, I have to admit that a good amount (not all) of Asian-Americans are indeed nerds who have almost no life other than studying. But, that being said, there are also people who do take all AP classes and also have life just because they are natural geniuses. Provided with all those statements, I do think that affirmative action is necessary, as undeniably, Asian-Americans have the privilege of excelling in academic achievements due to their parents’ custom of teaching and educating them; while on the other hand, other races (not being presumptuous, since I do not know other races all that well) MIGHT not be raised by that kind of parents. That is why affirmative action is implemented. It is so as to open more opportunities up for students from other races as well, instead of Asian-Americans, who stereotypically do well in academic field.

  • Maryam Iftikhar

    They’re probably some bunch of imbeciles. I have three sisters, among them one goes to Harvard, the second goes to Yale and the third goes to Columbia. On the contrary, we four are Asians and  we did not experience any sort of disgraceful behavior.  Ivies are famous due to their honesty, dignity and social justice and i do not think that being an Asian will change ones life.  This is all crap. They indeed have a specific acceptance rate for Asians, for sure. 

  • Maryam Iftikhar

    * well, I should not mention myself as i have to apply this year. So lets see. Hahah, just kidding.

  • Brinda

    This was a highly unprofessional post. Not very helpful. A joke? Yes. I mean really? Quote, Quote- “iii. Asians: You’re screwed. It’s not the negative-50
    SAT points that will get you, it’s the nebulous world of underhanded
    anti-Asian discrimination that upper education can’t quite shake, of
    late. Part I of our guide saw an admissions officer snorting at “another Asian math genius with no personality.” Thats completely untrue. Thats like saying all Americans hog upon cheeseburgers and are fat, which is obviously, not the case. Next time, be sure to refrain from statements like that. Asians have feelings too. Which, even if you’re not aware of, the world is.

  • Elementus

    I don’t get this @ all. I am trying to find out what would be a great career to go in to, but I really want to be involved in Criminal Justice or Paramedicity. Do you actually have to be involved in sports? I’m going to a colleger Prep school and they dont have physical training involved, but do have horses. WIll someone please explain to me?  

  • Nadiacm

    Yeah, this was funny and pretty well-written, but completely destroying my hopes and ambitions here. I stopped reading. Definitely not material for someone who actually wants to get into an IVY league school.

  • jfuz

    People who actually think this post was going to help at all are delusional. This post was meant to be funny, not an actual step by step guide to getting into an Ivy league school. The funny thing is that some of these readers will actually take this seriously and try to jump buildings in one step. And I thought prospective students at Ivy league schools were supposed to be smart.

  • Ann

    That is ridiculous, Asians DO have personality and you are teaching students to hide their race, if you DO not know how to help people get into a college, so shut up.
    Who are you to say that asians do not have personality?! 
    THIS IS THE WORST POST I HAVE EVER SEEN!!!

  • Pianobaby1211

    You do know that this is just satire right. People seem to be taking this so seriously!

  • Asian Dude

    This was hilarious.

  • your mom

    anyone born after 1985 is an idiot, which probably includes most of you bloggers on this post.  I want to get into Harvard/Yale/blah blah blah…Ivy league is overrrated.  Go to UC-Berkeley or University of Illinois.  It all depends on what you want to study you tools.  Have fun in your life and follow your passion, rather than following the dogma of Ivy League schools.  Brand name ain’t shit…and you ain’t shit either if you went to Yale.  

  • http://twitter.com/The_Evil_Hare Sam Medina

    Funny post, though you left out a few points. Here’s some factors that can help you get into Princeton:

    Be Jewish. 25% of the student body is Jewish… if you think that’s a coincidence, you belong in community college :P

    Be a jock. Every varsity coach gets a wishlist of 10 kids who will completely bypass the admissions process and be admitted. With more than 20 varsity teams, and a freshman class of only 1200 or so, you do the math.

    Or, be a creative genius from a poor family. If you go this route, though, it is likely that 2 years in your parents will decide you are ‘majoring in witchcraft.’ They will subsequently decide that they do not wish to ‘support the devil’s kingdom,’ and then they will refuse to pay the measly $2000 Princeton is asking them for. When Princeton calls them to investigate this, they will turn around and say that they never told you this, and proceed to badmouth you so badly to the University that instead your getting some help in your time of need, Princeton will:

    1. Take away your campus job
    2. Reduce your scholarship
    3. Withhold your degree and transcripts until you pay up, rendering that ‘get paid to get your PhD’ fellowship you won completely useless.
    4. Tell you a few days before graduation that NO, they will NOT let you graduate.
    5. Refuse to give you a hardship deferment when you become homeless, so that you can never get a government job since you’ve defaulted on a student loan.
    6. Hold onto your degree for 13 years.
    7. Not have even a shred of mercy on you.

    Sadly enough, this really happened to me.

    Sam Medina, Class of ’96 Princeton

    • guest

      Sam, This is f*ing terrible. How did you get on the wrong side of so many people – starting with your parents? Whatever, dude I feel sorry for you.

  • http://twitter.com/The_Evil_Hare Sam Medina

    Also, regarding Affirmative Action … To quote Fred Hargadon, who was Dean of Admissions when I applied to and attended Princeton: “We’re a private institution. We do whatever the hell we want. No free rides.”

    I don’t know about the other Ivies, but Princeton never cut me any breaks…

  • Wordwerry

    I agree with A+

  • Dumplings with Soysauce

    Most Asians (like me) don’t even choose to be the GPA and SAT centered type of people. It’s because the Asian mothers and fathers always ask “WHY YOU NO DOCTOR YET”, so if Asians strive to become athletic and have a life, they get whipped by their parents for not being a doctor.

    WE HAVE NO CHOICE, DON’T DISCRIMINATE!

  • http://www.harvardmomadvice.com/ gracesullivan

    My daughter go into several Ivy League schools and is currently a freshman at Harvard and she’s loving it!
    I wrote an ebook outlining all the little academic tips I used to help her get into Harvard.
    I do think there are a lot of intelligent, great students out there that make a couple of decisions during high school that hurts their chances at their first choice college.
    To read more, check out my blog:www.harvardmomadvice.com

  • Dr12345

    The Ivey League Schools are a great thing but just because you get into an “Ivey League” does not mean that you will walk out an Ivey scholar or citizen.  Look at the last President that came out of Harvard. Yes, he had his flaws (all presidents do) but for god’s sake he could not even say “nuclear”. He said something more like “nuc-u-lar”.  When regarding race, it is a wild card…if you look at the past graduating classes, look at the ratio or ALL the minorities compared to white kids (more minorities means the admissions staff wants people of different races).  As for personal connections ABSOLUTELY USE THEM TO YOUR ADVANTAGE. Even in the regular job field it is who you know.  As for grades and test scores and extracurricular and which one weighs more…..TEST SCORES HAVE THE MOST WEIGHT followed by GPA followed by the extracurriculars.  

  • Harvardhottie

    whoa whoa.. its a joke. chill out.. have a juice box. unwad your knickers and enjoy the ride.

  • stupiiidddd

    I’m screwed because I’m asian and my parents are actually poor as fuck and I skip alot of school, even though Im only in high school I don’t think I can get into Brown or Yale FML

  • anonymous

    http://www.bradshawcollegeconsulting.com/college_acceptance_rate.html
    pretty much proof that this article isnt true.  asians seem to get accepted a lot compared to other races

  • Swapnasatya Satya

    Ivy gate if Asians are just boring geeks it means that you never took the time to see through them and whoever thinks rich have a greater privilige of getting into ivy league should really get an education ………..a true education that only life can teach and  money can’t. Viewers only your talent gets you into ivies not some trash like this

  • Guinevere

    hahahahahahahaha this is hilarious!  I just got into Brown and Penn so of course I was searching for Ivy League gossip….the funny thing is that I satisfy practically none of these requirements.  I’m white, both of my parents went to college (Virginia Tech and SUNY Brockport), I’m not a recruited athlete, and I’m not insanely wealthy.  However, I do have a 4.0 GPA and scored 2340 on the SAT’s.  College here I come!

  • IvyLeagueKiddo

    Sadly enough, this is post is actually quite
    true. Yet, we all strive to think Ivy League schools are some mere utopia of
    morals and for the high and noble; nonetheless, that’s plain old bullshit. In
    the modern world, its dog eats dog. There are no rules; it’s just a display
    they put up of credentials you must have just to subdue their Ivy League
    consciousness. Sigh. Anyways, thanks for the post, I’ll make sure to
    “bullshit up” my applications. 

  • Hankevs

    I’m a Korean student in currently attending Harvard Law School. Whatever you wrote up there is entirely faux. First of all, I’m not from an “insanely rich family” and my parents have nothing to do with Ivy League schools. And stop discriminating Asians, they’re the smartest students in the world, and whites think they’re superior only because of their skin color, that won’t get you to the top schools.

    • Rastusthigpen
      • Hankevs

        Excuse me, what are you expecting me to respond to. You want to humiliate me? I’m sorry, but that’s not enough. That’s Kim Jong-Il, I’m a South Korean. He has nothing to do with me. You’re the fool, trying to intimidate me because of my northern relatives who spend their free time shooting grenades up in the sky and into the sea. You’re no less than someone trying to convince another person the inferiority of his race. Find something else to do than posting useless information in a false blog.

        • Rastusthigpen

           

          Sorry
          to be so dilatory in my response, Mr. Mangeur de Chien.

          Thanks
          for the geography lecture. Yes, we get the North/South Korea
          thing. We inferior Americans who think we are “superior only because of [our]
          skin color” wasted 50,000 lives keeping you superior South Koreans from
          becoming buttboys for Kim Il Sung. That came after we ran the Japanese off
          after they sat on your faces from 1910-1945. We might actually have some qualities that don’t relate to skin color, no? We appreciate the gratitude you
          have always shown for our sacrifice and for opening the Ivy League to you. (Irony
          alert-That’s a joke, Mr M. de C. )

          You
          say the NOKORs have “nothing to do with me” but you then refer to them as your
          “northern relatives.” Relatives they are indeed.  Minjok is not just in
          the North, Mangeur de Chien. It is taught in the schools  in the South, so
          don’t lecture us that we are “trying to convince another person the
          inferiority of his race”. We’ll leave that to you. You are quite practiced at it. It is part of your
          national heritage. I bet you don’t talk about it on your application, do you?  Hitchens said NOKORs are a nation of racist dwarves. Well,
          SOKORs are just a nation of racist, better fed and slightly taller dwarves.
          Tell your SOKOR relatives who own the deli that the next time a black guy comes
          in not to follow him around the store, put his change in his hand and not on
          the counter, and treat him with some respect. (How’s that for
          “useful” information?)

          Asians
          (you really mean Koreans, don’t you) are “the smartest students in the world”?
          Of course you are!   Do you put that sort of triumphalism on your application? Koreans are smarter because they have bigger heads, you know, but you come up a bit short in
          this one rather embarrassing area,  http://www.targetmap.com/viewer.aspx?reportId=3073
          . Sorry, boy, you’re dead last. Take some more of those dead baby pills, that might
          help http://www.hollywoodlife.com/2012/05/07/china-dead-baby-pills-surface-south-korea

          Your
          fanatically determined campaign to game the application process and insert yourselves into the Ivy League is finally getting attention and meeting with resistance. Good.

          Apolo
          Anton Ohno sends his regards to you and all his fans in the South of Korea.

          (By
          the way, are you, Edward and EdwardLee all the same person? Be honest now.)

           

          • Hankevs

            No I don’t know what you’re talking about. And I don’t know who Edward or EdwardLee is, it just seems he has the same thoughts as I do. And what does the size of a penis have to with this?

          • Hankevs

            Who are you, Rastusthigpen? Are you a graduate, a high schooler, or what? What’s your problem? Why do you hate Koreans so much?

      • Edward

        shut up and do something else

        • Guest

           Like fry a puppy for dinner?

          • Ashley-Matthews

            Hahaha! 
            the only comment here by so far made me laugh. 

          • Edward

            yea somthin like that.

    • Sierrafaith

      im 12 my name is sierraand i really want to get into a ivyleague school i totally agree with youy dont discriminate people who dont have white skin i think koreans are better any way i wanna start early to get into one but i dont know what stuff to do unless people tell what to do to get into one

      • Hankevs

        Good question. Since you’re 12, just try to get interested in a major or something. In my case, economics. Just try to have a happy school life, think about what kind of APs you want to take (In my case, Macroeconomics, Microeconomics, Calculus, Biology, U.S. History, Government, and Politics) and try to join school clubs

      • Andie S

        Me too I’m 12 I have all AP I mean I’m white but my best friend is awesome and she’s Asian I have done writing contests and I am in 11 school clubs I am worried though because of the money I mean I’m not rich at all my family’s middle class my moms a nurse and my dad owns a restraunt and I don’t want to make my parents bankrupt and hankevs you really inspired I read yours I didn’t comment but how did you do it like the finances and stuff? I know what I want to do when I get into college I have it all planned (but the money) please help

    • Jennifer cheng

      Me too I’m not rich and my parents didn’t go to an ivy and I’m Asian and I’m attending Yale that’s stupid what they said

  • Kevin

    don’t underestimate asians just because they’re small eyed, they’re actually much more better than you whites. and instead of writing these stupid posts, get a life. use this time to study for the SAT or prepare your applications rather than post these useless posts because you re making this up. EVERYONE! DON’T BELIEVE THIS!!!!

  • Edwardlee

    My father is Korean and my mother is Japanese, and I am a graduate of Princeton University and currently attending Princeton Medical School. I am not rich either wealthy, but if you try hard you will be able to attend the Ivy League.

    • Rastusthigpen

       I’ve been to Princeton dozens of times. I’ve never seen a medical school there. Must be very selective. Did they create it just for you?

      • ba boom

        fabricating medical schools and bad grammar to boot…he’s really convincing isn’t he? 

        • Rastusthigpen

           Off to Brown Law School next, I bet.

      • Edwardlee

        Yes in fact they did create is just for me.

        • Hankevs

          Sorry, Mr. Lee. It is common etiquette that you do not post false information on official sites such as these. Come on, Mr. Lee, you should know better than to try to trick people like that. We’re not stupid enough to believe that.

        • Guest

           Oh herro Mr Ree you so funny

          • Poison Rose

             South Park =’D

  • Guest

    I was admitted to 7 Ivy league schools (didn’t apply to Yale), Stanford, MIT, and Northwestern. I am a minority, but I didn’t flourish it or write some emotional tear-jerking essay. I worked my ass off, did a ton of extracurriculars, did well on the SAT (but not perfect at all), did extremely well on my interviews, wrote awesome essays, and got in on my merit.
    I know 2400s with 800s on subjects tests with research positions that didn’t get in to the top schools that they applied to, and I know wealthy caucasians that didn’t get into some of the top schools that they applied to.
    But an admissions department looks at everything — experiences, extracurriculars, interviews, accomplishments, SAT scores, essays, EVERYTHING, and they try to have a balanced class, so these strategies aren’t even that true. Most often, good SATs mean good involvement, but not always, so there’s the correlation. Some minorities (many, from what I know) self select by working extremely hard, being well-accomplished, and then apply to good schools and get in, where as more caucasian people will apply out of some sense of self-entitlement and expect to get in, and then bitch when they don’t. Don’t’ get me wrong, minorities do this too, but they complain less when they don’t get in.

    Also, with regards to first gen., colleges see POTENTIAL too. They are very good at finding people that are going to be able to do work and have worked EXTREMELY hard in every other aspect of their life, and admissions knows they’ll work a lot on their academic endeavors too.

    My 2 cents.

  • Hankevs

    Now, I’ll make the official “How to be accepted into the Ivy League”

    1. Start early. You should have a good GPA from 9th grade and on to 12th grade. No school’s going to choose you if you flunk freshman year and excel in the rest. They want to choose someone who has a good chance of surviving the hardships of university.

    2. Prepare early. Prepare for the SAT early. Don’t try to prepare for all of it in senior year, that’s going to kill you. You should prepare steady from 9th grade, and on to 12th grade to get a high, sturdy score in the SAT.

    3. Fill your schedules with AP. The students who attend private/boarding schools don’t have to worry about this as much as the students who attend regular public schools. Private schools already have advanced curriculum, but in the case of public schools, you must fill your entire schedules with AP and Honor Roll to show the Ivy League your capability.

    4. Save your money. This may sound weird, but you should do this. Students who drop out of the Ivy League is either because they can’t handle it, or they have “money problems.” Tell your parents to make an account to save up for uni, because most likely there will be conflicts if you get to actually attend these top schools.

    5. Have a creative application. There are some students who HAVE filled their schedules with AP and Honor Rolls, HAVE received a 5.0 on every one of them, and HAVE perfect SAT scores, and HAVE lots of money, but they DON’T HAVE a good essay. Write an essay that shows the Ivy League special experience that changed your life and will touch theirs.

    Follow these steps, and you’ll most likely be on the campus of a top school sooner or later.^^

    • AcceptedByIvy

      Wow. (clap-clap-clap) Now I see someone with a bit of sense.

    • AsianatIvy

      As a Ivy League Pre-frosh, I’d agree with everything you said except for the “save your money” part.  If you’re earning less than 100k a year family income, DO NOT SAVE MONEY. Financial aid at ivies take care of everything, so you won’t be paying that much anyway. If you do save money, you’ll end up paying all your saved up money to the college.

      On the other hand, families earning 100k-180k , depending on which Ivy you’re aiming for, are in the gray zone. The financial aid for you is borderline

      180k+ families-> go ahead and save. You won’t get anything from the schools. 

      Hope this helps.

      • Samirah H Svana

        What if your parents earn 20M USD monthly but gives huge lectures on how much they had to work for it and make you feel guilty for even asking money for education? -_____- 

        • Claire

          I agree my moms a Nero surgeon and my dad owns franchises all over the world they don’t make me feel guilty but they are always saying I went to yaleand I went to Oxford but what if I didn’t want to go to college but I do I mean I’m only in 7th but I’ve been getting academic bling since 3rd grade I live here in NYC and I go to a private school so it’s not fair for the chances I have compared to the chances some one else has

          • LOLLLLLLL

            i’m 12 and what is this

  • Chanelsportsbabe

    got into an ivy league with a 1900 sat and 4.5 g.p.a. average. IM NOT PERFECT like most that apply each year and get rejected. you really just need to be unique and have a passion for making a difference in the world, not just to become a doctor and be rich…

  • Eva<3Cats

    OK!My teacher is’nt even asian and she talks about how hardworking & smart asians are!I’m not either I think the -50pts does’nt matter because asians are so smart!You know asians invented gun powder and cannons?Discrimanation is WRONG!

    • Harvard Admissions

       I’d argue that it’s very right. Anyway, looks like you won’t be making the Ivy League anytime soon ahahah

      • Samria H Svana

        Haha In my high school, Asians are made fun off because of being too smart-ass but the sad thing is that Asians are smart but not enough to be out of the practical world i mean my brother’s Asian friend this guy got higher GPA and SAT score then him, but now my bro is a Wall-street magnate while he is working for him :P….so it’s like Asians are more preferred in UK , Asians should try there instead wasting their time getting into public/state/Ivy colleges here. 

  • aingian

    this is completely bullshit. i cant believe you think you believe that coming from “an extremely rich family” will help. lying about race? a disgrace.

  • Harvard Admissions

    No one wants Asians in the Ivy League. Why is this so difficult for you Asian robots to process?