If You’re Not a Cornellian You Shouldn’t Sport Cornell Gear
American movies and TV shows are filled with fictional Ivy Leaguers. (To name a few, Bruce Wayne of “Batman” is a Princetonian, Peter Parker of “Spider Man” is a Columbian, and Elle Woods of “Legally Blonde” is a Harvard Law student.) But, as a seeming reflection of real life, Harvard, Yale, and Princeton get the most attention; the others – most notably Penn, Cornell, and Dartmouth – are, to the chagrin of many of their alums, given the shaft.
“The Office”, however, runs against the media’s obsession with the H-Y-P triumvirate and features a character that bleeds Big Red blood: Cornell alum and highly successful Dunder Mifflin lackey Andy Bernard (Ed Helms). Though the show’s writers have made several rather deprecating jibes at Cornell in past seasons, they’ve ratcheted it up to new heights in the newest episode, which aired last Thursday.
On the day after Halloween, Dwight Schrute – the Assistant to the Regional Manager – struts into work sporting a Cornell sweater. This distresses Andy quite clearly; he laughs tensely at first, and then – once Dwight is at his desk – walks over and informs him that he shouldn’t be wearing Cornell merchandise. The Cornell references escalate as the episode proceeds; near the end Andy conducts an alumni interview with Dwight, who has ostensibly applied to study at the Agriculture School.
After the jump: a few quotes and a YouTube video.
Dwight: So, uh, how do you think we’re gonna do against Penn this year? Nathan Ford’s arm looks pretty strong.
Andy: He’s had a pretty good season so far… Stop saying “we.” You did not go to Cornell, ok? You’re just doing this to screw with me.
Dwight: Not so, Cornell is an excellent school. Without its agricultural we probably wouldn’t have cabbage. At least not modern cabbage.
Andy: I know it’s an excellent school, Dwight. I went there. My blood runs Big Red.
Dwight: Some day we’ll get together in Comstock Hall and just laugh about all this.
Meredith: You know I once dated a couple guys from Cornell. They were really nice. They gave me a ride home.
Andy: I seriously doubt anyone from Cornell dated you.
Creed: It’s pronounced colonel and it’s the highest rank in the military.
Andy: It’s pronounced Cor-nell! It’s the highest rank in the Ivy League!
Dwight: Andy, I’ve been meaning to ask you. Which a capella group should I join? The Harmoniacs? Or the Doh-Ray-Mee-gos?
Three actors on “The Office” attended Ivy League schools: B.J. Novak (Ryan Howard) went to Harvard, Mindy Kaling (Kelly Kapoor) went to Dartmouth, and John Krasinski (Jim Halpert) went to Brown. This may explain why Cornell is – quite hilariously – hated upon in the show.
What we really want to know is whether or not Cornellians love or loathe “The Office” for its obsession with their school. Readers, weigh in!


