I-Banker, Distracted by Sex, Fails to Save Economy
A sexually adventurous week for Ivy Leaguers! First we saw some Harvard guy's dong, and now, in New York Magazine's weekly "Sex Diaries," "The Overserved Ivy Banker Chick," a financially savvy dame with a thing for Jews, uppers, and foot massages. Though not as mindblowing as Lena Chen's "The Ivy League Co-Ed Who Orgasms In Her Sleep," Overserved details myriad scintillating sex acts with a bunch of Ivy League douches:
11 p.m.: Wasted and drooling all over this guy I know from college. He was president of College Republicans or something. God, I love southern accents and seersucker. My roommate gives me this "you've got to be kidding me" look.
11:17 p.m.: Bump into a guy I used to hook up with a while ago. He is the son of a very famous senator. I once gave him a blow job in college, and he was so ticklish he giggled through the whole thing.
Oooh, a puzzle! Seersucker has "Princeton" written all over it, so my bet is Harrison Frist, Princeton '06, who used to work at Goldman.
Naturally, some people are voicing doubt that Overserved exists at all. Nitpicky hair-splitting after the jump.
On the other hand, shortened hours and hungover mornings could explain why Lehman et. al. tanked.
Actually, this is exactly the way Ivy Leaguers roll. Didn't you read American Psycho? Far more dubious is the notion that the Ivy League could produce so many sexually talented and physically spectacular hot guys. Admit it, Overserved. Some of them were chubby and awkward.
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September 18th, 2008 at 1:58 pm
This is real. I know who the Barclay’s trader is.
September 23rd, 2008 at 10:36 pm
this is atrocious…als, it is a dubious notion that the Ivy League does not spawn licentious, warped young men and women. I will never understand for the life of me why people love Manhattan so much, and am now a little glad the pressure to make inroads on Wall St after business school or law school will soon evaporate….now I’ll just go to one of them and hope the market has changed once I’m done
September 23rd, 2008 at 10:40 pm
I definitely contradicted myself….No amount of self-effacing humor can hide one’s desire to get a piece of the pie the financial sector offers…mmmm, over-leverage finds lacking liquidity that lack FDIC-backing, yummer, sign me up!
September 25th, 2008 at 9:37 am
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