This week, New York Magazine strengthens its iron grip on the sexual narratives of upwardly mobile Ivy League females in New York. That’s right, the people who brought you “The Overserved Ivy Banker Chick” would now like you to meet “The Single College Girl Obsessed With a Yale Law Student“:
7:30 p.m.: Best friend gets a call from an acquaintance inviting us to a party at her older brother’s apartment. He goes to Yale Law School — we’ll be there.
11:05 p.m.: Party is okay. Talk to some fellow Ivy Leaguers who spurt intellectual justifications as to why they’re using their education to make exorbitant amounts of money for themselves rather than bettering society.
11:37 p.m.: Introduced to acquaintance’s older brother. He mentions something about opera, and I feign interest because he’s pretty cute. He then proceeds to quiz me about some esoteric English composer in order to make me sound and feel like a total idiot. Determine that he probably wants in my pants.
12:42 a.m.: Suspicion confirmed when he challenges me to a game of darts. Just as I’m about to shoot my first dart, I feel his arms wrap around my waist and he whispers in my ear, “How’s your concentration now?” I’m immediately aroused.
Yale Law sounds like a total douche. College Girl, save yourself for someone better! Like your hospital co-worker who sexually harasses you in all the right ways: Read the rest of this entry »