We Are the Change We’ve Been Waiting For
Good morning, idle Ivy League interns! I'm Mike, Brown ’10, and Jesus Christ is it a slow news month.
Seriously -- what the hell. Please, get out of your office, do something embarrassing and send us a video. Start a damaging rumor about someone you don't like.
Anything.
Many thanks to Nina and Charleton for holding down the fort. I am excited to take the reins at this esteemed blog for the next two weeks.
I will try to post some cheap, ethics-free entertainment when I am not at my day job interning at a newspaper in New York, where I pretend I am a serious journalist.
And now I'm happy to introduce the second guest editor:
Dear IvyGate Readers,
My name is Andrew Martin and I used to go to Columbia University in the city of New York. Unfortunately, I've had to move from the trendy bar district of Morningside Heights to the utterly desolate heart of the East Village. Some nights, I wake up screaming "Senior Night at the West End!" and realize that I have nowhere to go. But that's all right. I'm an intern at a very nice old magazine with downtown offices and I work with other people who attended Ivy League colleges, or foreign colleges that are even better than Ivy League colleges. I've moved up from getting rejected by Barnard girls to getting rejected by much prettier NYU girls. And I've got my Secret Ivy Ring now, which helps me get out of scrapes with the law on land and sea. My goal is to serve you. If something's not up to par, treat me as you would the help: with a swift kick to the shins.
****************************************************
True, it's another two weeks for you guys of hit-or-miss guest editors. But please, don't be too hard on us -- you almost had this instead. (Please, do click.)
--MIKE BECHEK AND ANDREW MARTIN
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July 7th, 2008 at 7:40 am
Here’s a story: for the past month, all IvyGate entries were written by a Barnard girl.
July 7th, 2008 at 8:05 am
Is Barnard even an Ivy?
July 7th, 2008 at 9:00 am
oh great it’s andrew “fucking” martin, legend of stage and screen from columbia, lead singer of “campfire beacon,” america’s #1 vampire weekend cover band
who let him on the internet, I thought it had taken out a restraining order against him after the “dimitri assface” brawl down in little odessa
July 7th, 2008 at 12:06 pm
maybe you just get rejected by everyone because you’re a large bag of douche.
July 7th, 2008 at 2:00 pm
At Kurtz and Hahvahd. Seriously. Get over yourselves
July 7th, 2008 at 2:59 pm
look. stop commenting about whether or not barnard is an ivy school. nick promised there would be open comments again once he figures out how to block you fuckers, or the blogging technology is sufficiently advanced so that it can build a robot, a robot who can read and delete these slanderous comments.
July 7th, 2008 at 8:00 pm
Please, do go fuck yourselves.
July 8th, 2008 at 12:21 am
@crunknellian
you still seem bitter that you didn’t get to be guest ivygate editor.
July 8th, 2008 at 8:58 am
LOL I knew that questioning the ivy-ness of Barnard would set off a string of comments like the ones above… so fucking predictable…
July 8th, 2008 at 9:32 am
“LOL”? Are you serious?
July 9th, 2008 at 6:30 pm
What? Why are you making fun of Evan? He’s a great writer. I’m confused.