Famous Chick’s Brother Kind of a Jerk.
An epistolary drama in three acts.
The scene: A play at Princeton’s Berlind Theater needs a line-prompter. A group email seeks volunteers. To minimize needless responses, the vounteer is to “reply all” so everyone knows the position has been filled. Freshman KaYee Ivy Lau responds,
I can do it if you still need someone :)
Enter, stage two-left-feet: Roby Sobieski, sophomore thespian and little brother of actress Leelee Sobieski. Noticing Ms. Lau’s foreign-sounding name, Roby pens a patronizing response that quotes English dictionaries at length and points her to a career in telemarketing. He sends it to the entire list. An excerpt:
Dear Ka Yee Ivy Lau,
…As the Oxford English dictionary defines it, a prompter is: “A person in a theatre placed in a position next to the stage but out of sight of the audience, in order to be able to prompt the actors.”
Search for further information brought me this as well: “Prompts are mouthed silently or hurled lyrically in a half-voice, audible (hopefully) only on stage.”
Now while I’m sure that you would do your best, I have a feeling that someone who presses reply all and notifies his/her actions to an entire email list is not the best choice for the job of being discreet and/or silent in a theatre. Also, now everyone on this list would also be distracted during the production, wondering who the “elusive” Ka Yee Ivy Lay is.
But do not fret my friend, I am sure that somewhere out there, there is a job for you. Perhaps telemarketer?
For the record, Ivy is Princeton ‘11 and attended one of the best international boarding schools in the world, located in the British Isles. We’re guessing she’ll do better than “telemarketer.”
Now, if the point of the original “reply all” was to minimize email clutter, Roby undid it, and then some. What follows is 50+ emails from the entire Berlind list-which includes not just students but alumni patrons, staff, and faculty-tearing the little Sobieski several new ones and assuring Ivy that she would, in fact, be a very good prompter. Then, the backlash: Stop spamming! Backlash to the backlash: Spamming is fun! Also, Roby’s sister has nice tits!
Roby’s final missive: A single hyperlink, to a clip of his sister discussing his sex appeal on national television. Lest there be any confusion: Roby Sobieski is not just any rude brat. He is a highly entitled, younger-sibling-of-someone-famous rude brat.
Complete story arc after the jump.
ACT I: RISING ACTION
Berlind director Daryl Waskow sends the first email, to the Lewis Center for the Arts list:
Sent: Friday, April 04, 2008 12:20:13
To: LewisCtr-STUDENTS@Princeton.EDU
Subject: Prompter needed Tonight and TomorrowDear Students,
Tonight the Orange Woman opens in the Berlind Theater. As usual with a new play that been developed in rehearsal, we need a Prompter tonight and tomorrow. You will need to sit in the second row, follow along in the script, and read the lines if an actor calls for a line.You would need to be in the Berlind Theater by 7:30 and check in with Carmelita Becnel, the Stage Manager. The play runs an hour and forty five minutes, so you will be done by 10:00.
Please let me know if you have any questions. Please reply all if you can help.
Thanks,
Darryl Waskow
[phone number redacted]
The intrepid Ms. Lau tiptoes to the fore:
Sent: Friday, April 04, 2008 14:29
From: Ka Yee Ivy Lau <[redacted]@Princeton.EDU>I can do it if you still need someone :)
Roby sweeps onto the scene, dictionaries drawn and blazing:
Date: Fri, 04 Apr 2008 16:15:09
From: Roby Sobieski <[redacted]@Princeton.EDU>Dear Ka Yee Ivy Lau,
While I’m sure the Orange Woman would be pleased with your help, I’m not sure that you would be the right person for the job.
As the Oxford English dictionary defines it, a prompter is:
“A person in a theatre placed in a position next to the stage but out of sight of the audience, in order to be able to prompt the actors.”
Search for further information brought me this as well:
“Prompts are mouthed silently or hurled lyrically in a half-voice, audible (hopefully) only on stage.”
Now while I’m sure that you would do your best, I have a feeling that someone who presses reply all and notifies his/her actions to an entire email list is not the best choice for the job of being discreet and/or silent in a theatre. Also, now everyone on this list would also be distracted during the production, wondering who the “elusive” Ka Yee Ivy Lay is.
But do not fret my friend, I am sure that somewhere out there, there is a job for you. Perhaps telemarketer?
Sincerely yours,
Roby
ACT II: THE ENRAGED RESPONSE
Lewis list bitchslaps Roby, defends fair maiden KaYee Ivy Lau. The detractors include Roby’s peers:
Date: Fri, 04 Apr 2008 16:38:11
From: Tessa Brown <[redacted]@Princeton.EDU>Dear Roby,
Two points:
a. The original e-mail specifically said “reply all,” probably so as to prevent a tiresome accrual of numerous students’ generous offers of help.
b. Your e-mail was incredibly mean spirited. But we’re so glad you’re aware that the OED is the ultimate reference tool for English-speakers!Sincerely thankful we don’t know you,
Tessa Brown and Annika Welander ‘08
…an alumnus:
Date: Fri, 04 Apr 2008 16:41:29
From: Jenny Chiurco <[redacted]@gmail.com>You know, there are alumni on this list – myself included. And I can’t help but think that you’re being unnecessarily condescending to someone who was volunteering their time to help you out.
Did you by chance attend Horace Mann? Pick up a copy of New York magazine this week, read the article, and then think twice about the next time YOU hit reply all.
…and someone who got an ‘A’ in writing seminar for citing sources:
Date: Fri, 04 Apr 2008 16:47:12
From: Dave Holtz! <[redacted]@Princeton.EDU>Dear Roby Sobieski,
While I’m sure you meant to come off as a pretentious and arrogant prick
when you wrote this e-mail (at least I hope you did anyway), there is
something in your extremely obnoxious e-mail which is fundamentally
flawed. You suggest that “someone who presses reply all and notifies his
/ her actions to an entire e-mail list is not the best choice for the
job of being discreet and / or silent in a theater” (Sobieski, Line 7).
However, if you refer to the e-mail that Darryl Waskow originally sent
to the Lewis Center Students list serve, he requests that one should
“please reply all if [they] can help” (Waskow, Line 5). As you can
clearly see (or maybe you can’t, since you’re an idiot), someone who
notifies his/her actions to an entire e-mail list may very well may be
the best choice for the job of being discreet and/or silent in the
theater. This is particularly true since they have the ability to read,
comprehend, and follow direction. In case you misunderstand the
definition of read, since you failed to fully comprehend Mr. Waskow’s
original e-mail, it is defined by Oxford English Dictionary as:“To consider, interpret, discern, etc.”
I would generally subscribe to the interpretation that when a person
says “please reply all” (Waskow, Line 5), one should reply all. Then
again, I’m not a pompous and overzealous ignoramus. I don’t disagree
that Ivy would be a great telemarketer, but I don’t treat the traits
that constitute telemarketer and prompter as mutually exclusive. Ivy is
actually really personable and great (two personality traits that you
seem to lack…), and would probably be quite successful in many
different fields. In the future, please restrain yourself from sending
e-mails of this nature. If you fail to do so, I will have no choice but
to continue to point out in public that you are a complete idiot.In conclusion, shut up.
Sincerely,
Dave HoltzWork Cited
Sobieski, Roby. The most obnoxious e-mail I’ve ever seen. 4 Apr. 2008.
Waskow, Daryll. Prompter needed Tonight and Tomorrow. 4 Apr. 2008.
Badly outnumbered and backed into a corner, the anti-hero apologizes:
Date: Fri, 04 Apr 2008 16:55:08
From: Roby Sobieski <[redacted]@Princeton.EDU>Sorry to anyone who found my email insulting. I personally thought it was
funny and wasn’t being personal. If I’ve truly offended any of you I
apologize. Best of luck to the production.
ACT III: FALLING ACTION
Innocent third-parties, annoyed by the “reply all” flood, renounce Berlind affiliations and demand liberation from torturous prison of escalating emails:
Date: Fri, 04 Apr 2008 17:15:42
From: Harry Schiff <[redacted]@Princeton.EDU>Please remove the multi-pronged sticks from your collective asses. It
was a joke, a bad joke, but a joke. A horrible, stupid, waste-of-
precious-seconds-of-my-life-that-I-will-never-be-able-to-recover joke,
but a joke. You’re a presence is a stain upon this earth, your words
a poison to my ears, but nonetheless, I must defend you, you useless
piece of trash. At least if you read this I will consider myself
vindicated for the sacrifice of my precious seconds. Also, someone
needs to take me off this e-mail list which I have no business being on.Love and kisses to all,
Harry
Newly-offended parties include a professor at NYU:
Date: Fri, 04 Apr 2008 15:25:18
From: Steve Wangh <[redacted]@NYU.EDU>PLEASE STOP THIS REPLY TO ALL DELUGE!!
Stephen Wangh
Arts Professor (ret), NYU
Visiting Faculty, Naropa University
Alone in his guilt, abandoned by his peers, his inbox in shambles, the anti-hero limps back into the spotlight. His swan song:
Date: Fri, 04 Apr 2008 17:49:14 -0400
From: Roby Sobieski <[redacted]@Princeton.EDU>
– fin. –
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April 8th, 2008 at 9:17 am
Is she even relevant after “A Dungeon Siege Tale” and “The Wicker Man”, two of the worst films in recent memory?
April 8th, 2008 at 9:18 am
He looks like a weenie to me
April 8th, 2008 at 10:05 am
Very enjoyable read, good post Ivygate
reminds me much of Blitzwars
April 8th, 2008 at 10:58 am
Didn’t he get hosed from Ivy?
April 8th, 2008 at 11:44 am
hey ivygate, great read. just wondering, why do you redact email addresses that can so easily be looked up by anyone with internet tubular skillz on http://www.princeton.edu ?
April 8th, 2008 at 12:26 pm
funny timing. i saw leelee at the street this weekend.
April 8th, 2008 at 12:32 pm
solid post. i can’t wait to graduate and get away from douchebags like this guy.
then again, i’ll probably be surrounded by similar brats at my job.
April 8th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
Great post! Feels like ‘06 again. Sounds like a total douchebag, and his sister was horrific in Joan d’Arc.
April 8th, 2008 at 12:59 pm
umm, you’re a freshman at yale and you’ve been reading ivygate since 2006? lol. have fun at highschool?
April 8th, 2008 at 1:02 pm
leelee sobieski is one helluva wooden actor. has she even been in anything recent? or for that matter, anything good?
April 8th, 2008 at 1:22 pm
There’s this great thing called archives, big guy. Amazing invention, I know.
April 8th, 2008 at 1:34 pm
I started reading IvyGate when I was in elementary school. Want to fight about it?
April 8th, 2008 at 1:39 pm
I happen to find this e-mail exchange one of the funniest at princeton thus far. You’re story is a complete bs representation of roby, but hey, that’s how you make money. It is asinine when people reply all (end of story), and roby was criticizing this person for doing it as needs to be done. Also, he recieved more positive e-mails then negative ones, but you didn’t post any of those did you? better get the facts straight…
April 8th, 2008 at 1:44 pm
@@pton… you’re not fooling anyone, roby.
April 8th, 2008 at 1:46 pm
Leelee’s polish peasant knockers are the stuff of dreams. leelee’s brother is a putz who reminds me of another shlong I know whos father is somewhat famous. these types tend to look good but acheive absolutely nothing of substance.
April 8th, 2008 at 1:53 pm
Except Roby has a fetish for asians…..
April 8th, 2008 at 1:53 pm
@hi I’m actually his roommate. :)
April 8th, 2008 at 2:10 pm
@pton: quick glance at point shows that that’s impossible. you have a single, actually.
April 8th, 2008 at 2:18 pm
That’s because my name’s been removed from the princeton.edu list for personal reasons. Why don’t you try the princeton facebook “https://facebook.princeton.edu/home.php”.
April 8th, 2008 at 2:23 pm
“its asinine when people reply all”
So you mean it’s asinine to FOLLOW DIRECTIONS? It’s much more asinine to BE A DOUCHE
April 8th, 2008 at 2:33 pm
but being a douche is far mor fun!
April 8th, 2008 at 3:20 pm
Hey Roby (and your imaginary roommate as well)–why don’t you post some of those “positive e-mails” here? Sure, you can woof all you want about how much people love you, but unless you can produce those gushing emails, you’ll still be viewed as an asinine douche.
April 8th, 2008 at 4:49 pm
1) I got all of these emails. It was annoying as hell. Roby may have opened the can of worms, but about six thousand other people replied all, asking to be taken off the list. Those emails were more annoying than the initial.
2) Roby Sobieski is harmless. He has a quirky sense of humor-which in this case I don’t find particularly funny. Nonetheless, without knowing him, I don’t think it’s fair to judge his overall character. (Though I agree, his email was pure idiocy).
3) He lives in a double. His roommate did post that. I know both of them. I would post some of the other emails, but I actually deleted most of them because they were clogging my inbox.
4) I also saw Leelee at the street… briefly.
Thanks. Let’s stop the harping.
April 8th, 2008 at 5:28 pm
Hasn’t Roby Sobieski done this before, when some people “replied all” to an English course’s mailing list?
April 8th, 2008 at 6:00 pm
Roby is pretty much harmless. Cut the kid a break.
April 8th, 2008 at 6:12 pm
He is a harmless douchebag. I find that funny and I thank ivygate for posting it.
April 8th, 2008 at 6:33 pm
Roby’s a good kid.
April 8th, 2008 at 8:25 pm
What’s funny is that Roby never really owned up to the mistake. In effect, he says “I think I’m funny, if you don’t, I’m sorry.” Real class act.
A quick “I’m an idiot, I scanned the original post too quickly, let’s all laugh about it” would have done wonders.
But since we’re just joking and not being personal, I think you, Roby Sobieski, as a person, are a total and complete jackass. Again, not personal.
April 8th, 2008 at 9:27 pm
Roby did do that to an English class list last semester…I guess it’s a pet peeve. In any case, he’s a nice kid. Quirky, but harmless, like people have already said.
The email deluge was started by Roby but made worse by other people. Far too many people failed to see the hypocrisy in sending a message saying “STOP REPLYING TO ALL!” to the entire mailing list.
April 8th, 2008 at 10:14 pm
Anyone who doesn’t know him or doesn’t go to Princeton should probably just keep their thoughts to themselves. You don’t know the guy. You never will. This doesn’t affect you. Game over.
April 8th, 2008 at 11:22 pm
Isn’t that pretty much the definition of every single post on IvyGate? And yet we still read them, and so, it seems, do you. Hmm… Looks like I just ruined your perfect logic. Let the games continue…
April 8th, 2008 at 11:23 pm
…if we don’t know him personally? We can still express our opinions as to his douchebaggery and general stupidity. I didn’t know Aleksey Vayner either.
April 8th, 2008 at 11:33 pm
Simply because I read something doesn’t mean that I endorse it or that I make value judgments about people’s overall character because of one incident. Everyone makes stupid mistakes. Some people just get caught in the limelight.
April 8th, 2008 at 11:40 pm
I was so happy to open my laptop to see 50 new messages only to realize it was this load of crap.
April 9th, 2008 at 12:00 am
This sounds like a typical blitzwar. I can’t imagine my college experience without at least 15 of these per year.
April 9th, 2008 at 12:26 am
Hey guys! Make sure you check out my videolink: http://www.mandjshow.com/videos/actress-leelee-sobieski/
April 9th, 2008 at 12:40 am
if Britney Spears danced with him isn’t that proof enough that he isn’t a “d-bag?” Britney is far too classy to associate with your average run-of-the-mill dol. Roby is right to use this in his defense, and it’s not at all bragging. That would be douchey.
April 9th, 2008 at 12:56 am
Cut Roby some slack. He’s a sweet kid and can we really cast the first stone for blitzing an email list? Wait. This is IvyGate. Yes we can.
Anyway, the show that they were debating who would be prompter for – Orange Woman…AMAZING. And Ka Yee was an admirable prompter…
And question: would this even be worth discussing if he weren’t Leelee’s baby bro?
April 9th, 2008 at 12:58 am
Cut Roby some slack. He’s a sweet kid and can we really cast the first stone for blitzing an email list? Wait. This is IvyGate. Yes we can.
Anyway, the show that they were debating who would be prompter for – Orange Woman…AMAZING. And Ka Yee was an admirable prompter…
And question: would this even be worth discussing if he weren’t Leelee’s baby bro?
April 9th, 2008 at 1:22 am
To all the “reply all” whiners:
Get Gmail, STFU.
That is all.
April 9th, 2008 at 8:57 am
Apparently, he’s the one who brought up his familial association with some random other chick I’d only heard of as That Girl From Deep Impact.
April 9th, 2008 at 12:54 pm
didn’t he get hosed from Ivy? didn’t his roommate get hosed too?
good decisions are made sometimes i guess.
April 9th, 2008 at 1:50 pm
According to his family and friends, Roby thinks he’s the shit but when it comes down to it I think he is just a worthless piece of shit.
April 9th, 2008 at 2:40 pm
He actually thought that email was funny?
April 9th, 2008 at 3:04 pm
I’m proud that I called him a douche first, not on a list, but in an e-mail directly to him last Friday.
What a worthless piece of shit.
April 9th, 2008 at 3:07 pm
not on the* list
April 9th, 2008 at 5:19 pm
Look at her expression in the picture. She looks really uncomfortable. Maybe Roby was drunk and groped her boobs a second before the picture was taken.
April 9th, 2008 at 6:10 pm
Reply-all spam wars are not limited to college. About every six months at Morgan Stanley, someone replies to all with an “I’m on vacation” auto-reply or some non-sequitur. Someone else replies to all with “unsubscribe” and… the pile goes critical. Beautiful really.
Some Princetonians just got a glimpse of their future. So they got that going for them. Which is nice.
April 9th, 2008 at 8:45 pm
Just wanted to say that I have replied all 3 times in my Princeton career. The first 2 times, the people did not have, I quote, “foreign sounding names”, so the proposition that I did it because of that is completely ridiculous, especially given that I went to a foreign-speaking school and my whole education was foreign, as were most of my pre-college friends.
April 9th, 2008 at 9:14 pm
Bullshit. I don’t believe you; there was totally a racist tone in your reply-all email. What’s your beef, dude? Why the hate?
April 9th, 2008 at 10:15 pm
Where is there a racist tone? By the fact that i quoted the oed? I’m an english major, that’s all i do…
April 10th, 2008 at 12:36 am
using her full name instead of first name implies the name is foreign beyond comprehension. (‘i have no idea where the first name is in all that.’) oed instead of webster’s is normally just pedantic. in concert with the name gaffe, it sounds superior or xenophobic. suggesting telemarketer magnifies the overall effect since that is a low prestige job. so it seems quoting the oed is not all you do.
April 10th, 2008 at 2:19 am
It’s a general policy that when you don’t know someone you use the person’s whole name in a letter/email. Say someone’s name is Bob Smith, you don’t write “Dear Bob” or “Dear Smith”, you write “Dear Bob Smith”.
Oed is the best English dictionary, why ever use another one?
Can you think of something else that would be a good opposite to “prompter”?
Prompter=someone who whispers something silently in a way that is heard by as few people as possible.
Telemarketer=Someone who loudly tries to pass on his information to as many people as possible.
So no….
April 10th, 2008 at 2:38 am
Honestly, while Roby’s email was unimaginably douchey, I was more annoyed by the idiots spamming “PLEASE GET ME OFF THE LIST.” Justine, here’s looking at you.
April 10th, 2008 at 3:16 am
Where do you get off judging? Choosing a mindless antonym does not make for a thoughtful counterpoint/suggestion. Perhaps English is not *your* forte.
April 10th, 2008 at 3:20 am
the very nature of it being a mindless antonym would make it inherently non-racist though. Not to mention that it seems like a logical antonym. Sobieski has a point.
April 10th, 2008 at 5:59 am
Ehh, this cheeky bastard really isn’t such a terrible guy; I’d probably like to have a beer with him.
Roby Sobieski ‘36!
April 10th, 2008 at 11:45 am
Please tell me all Princetonian quasi-celebrity elites aren’t as toolish as this one?
Sometimes I’m glad I’m up in the woods, where anyone remotely connected to fame is domed into humility.
April 14th, 2008 at 9:48 pm
This story is so perfect in so many ways.
April 15th, 2008 at 3:35 pm
LOL
April 15th, 2008 at 11:54 pm
I love how tessa and annika replied first to harp on roby. I expected that kind of unnecessary reply from tessa, especially since she loves the haterade.
April 20th, 2008 at 2:40 am
Seems he’s been defended in the observer. Looks to me like the writer of this post postulated false claims.
May 25th, 2008 at 1:54 pm
Roby Sobieski seems like he is using his siters fame to be a douche cause he feels insecure but is probably a nice guy
June 4th, 2008 at 7:47 am
How is he using his sister’s fame to be a douche? Even if he acted as a douche (which sort of seems false to me), that would have nothing to do with his sister. You, my friend, are a dumass. Oh…and…triple-post dumbfuck.
June 4th, 2008 at 11:31 pm
salami is just jealous
September 1st, 2009 at 3:47 am
This site is really attractive and I would no doubt visit again!