Is the job market really this bad?
WARNING: The links in this post are NSFW. Some go to a site you are supposed to be 21 years old to view.
The entire concept of irony bursts into flames and ceases to exist today. If the internets are to be believed, a real live Wharton student is whoring herself out. No, this is not another post about douchebags at McKinsey. Not about the shitty job market, or annoying sex columnists, or degrading internships fetching coffee for rich guys in pinstripe suits. We are talking about a literal prostitute, the kind that charges money for admission to her vagina. And if the so-called Eva and her madame Solana Jewel have anything to say about it, the little hussy goes to Penn:
Eva is a new addition to the Philadelphia scene! A hot Italian spinner! She is currently a finance major at a Ivy League university. I can assure you she is 100% GFE!
Rate is $300/hr, $450/1.5 hrs, $600/2hrs. Couples are $450/hr. Inquire for longer hours. She is also available for outcalls.
Miss Eva and Mama Lana were unavailable for comment (“press request” being outside the standard sex-for-money dialogue). But we are pretty sure the above blonde woman exists. Whether she actually attends Wharton, however, is another story. After the jump: We break down the knowns; the unknowns; and the many things that, in the course of investigating this story, we have come to know but really wish we didn’t.
Come! Enter the sordid world of Prostitution at Penn…
Known: There is an “exotic courtesan” named Eva, who has a “scheduler” named Solana Jewel, who goes on “dates” for money and claims to go to Penn.
Unknown: Unless it’s that other Ivy League university in Philadelphia that hands out degrees in finance! You know… Penn… State?
Wish We Didn’t Know: In this context, “spinning” has nothing to do with stationary bicycles in private gyms. And GFE? Not even close to GPA.
Known: Both YourExoticCourtesan and Eva are known entities in the Phila prostitute scene, and have been reviewed on multiple times on third-party websites. Eva’s even getting rave reviews!
Unknown: The infinite amount of porn emails one would receive upon registering a VIP account at TheEroticReview.com. A VIP account is needed to view the actual content of reviews.
Known: YourExoticCourtesan’s disclaimer explains, “In no way is this Company soliciting for prostitution.”
Known: If I have learned anything from Law & Order: SVU, the above is a lie.
Unknown: Short of coughing up $300 and going undercover as a Wharton dean, we have no way of proving or disproving this story. Despite our best attempts to convince them that this story would play really well in the media (everybody loves a smart, sassy hooker!) Solana Jewel and jewel-of-Wharton Eva declined to comment.
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March 6th, 2008 at 1:35 pm
It’s obviously Lena Chen who has put on a few pounds and is now sporting a blond wig. We all knew…
March 6th, 2008 at 3:46 pm
she has a tattoo of something on her foot (check the pics on the site). that should be unique enough for someone to ID her.
March 6th, 2008 at 3:48 pm
There is no way the young woman in those photos weighs 105 pounds…and I wouldn’t expect anything less from Penn (or Columbia for that matter). And I’m not sure Lena Chen would have to put on weight to have a figure like Eva, the opposite is probably the case.
March 6th, 2008 at 5:21 pm
chen is short. way shorter than eva.
March 6th, 2008 at 5:30 pm
whore or not, I would fuck this girl so hard you havno idea
March 6th, 2008 at 5:35 pm
Wow, dorg, you might want to stop humping the screen as you type, it’s a little embarrassing. Also, this is IvyGate, not Fleshbot. Just thought you should know.
March 6th, 2008 at 6:10 pm
What, like Ivygate is somehow more sophisticated?
March 6th, 2008 at 6:23 pm
She also has a tatoo on her right thigh…
http://yourexoticcourtesan.com/images/133.JPG
March 6th, 2008 at 6:48 pm
Let’s be honest, it is unlikely that this is actually someone in Wharton. It is easy enough to lie online. I’m sure that most prostitutes lie to get in whatever persona is needed for a client. But, if this is true it’s going to be as big as the “Ivy League Grind” story. Sucks for her.
March 6th, 2008 at 7:18 pm
Lena is 1/2 an inch away from midget-dom. She’s stumpy. The Whore-tonite is stumpy too.
March 6th, 2008 at 7:57 pm
You sick fucks up to the usual, maintaining the desensitization propcess for the sociopathic re-creation institutionalized infrastructure upgrades. Is this version satan101.666 ? How are the evil little bastards that sack emasculate and cannibalize their own military and homes while the goal is to defile their own team alpha male superior counterparts off fighting your war ? Oh how you rockefeller types are evil. Are we to understand correctly that the ideal american sex scene is to be on the front lines machine gun in hand mowing down innocent women and babies big bad billy waugh style with a chick bent over and y’all are pumping her and pulling train showering the head of the baby bareback because of course that america girl bent over being pumped by the team is your wife, and meanwhile back way back behind the lines getting primed for battle watching angelina and brad in mr and mrs satan you’re all being gassed by eric prince’s helicopters and his team using restricted CS gas just like in real life.
Oh and,
by the way
Gainseville, Florida the future summer home of a hopefully level 5 hurricane and many more summers of letting y’all know in advance to go out and buy a big fancy $200,000.00 motorhome, auto, boat, mobile home,jetskis, lear jets a little used gainseville is the place for your ? and if you don’t like it leave it in the lowest topographical location Killearn Lake Subdivision between Gilchrist and Bradford and Lake George later this year and near instant insurance check. If you’re really hard up for a profit have a storage policy put on it since you don’t plan to drive it afterwards anyways. As my game of prophecy grows I’ll make sure to include you having fun getting rich and safely running for your lives better than bush leadership and fema frauds.
March 6th, 2008 at 9:30 pm
Hey christianarchisti,just one question; are you a sociology major? Or a poetry major? I mean just what the fuck are you? Every post, and you blow my mind.
March 6th, 2008 at 10:10 pm
is there a website that randomly generates anarchist rants? I’m not suggesting christiananarchist is using one — that shit is gold. Just, you know, if I wanted to flip out on someone hardcore but I’m lacking that certain rhetorical flair…
March 6th, 2008 at 10:11 pm
I’d bet her hourly wage that she’s not an Ivy League student. If she was, she probably wouldn’t have thought it necessary to include the prices for 1.5 and 2 hours, given that it’s all at the same rate. An Ivy League student would have presumably figured this was obvious enough to render inclusion unnecessary.
March 6th, 2008 at 11:36 pm
She probably goes to Drexel and accidentally thinks she goes to Penn since she needs to come to our campus for everything anyway.
I remember in my criminology class my professor made us write a list of illegal activities we had done and then presented all the results on powerpoint. One person in a room of about 200 students admitted to prostitution. Apparently there is one person every semester. I thought the professor just put it in there to fuck with us.
March 7th, 2008 at 1:40 am
Ha i’d bed she went to penn- the photo shoot was clearly in one of our prison-like dorms (may I suggest Gregory?)
March 7th, 2008 at 1:49 am
who knows, but it’s possible. every once in a while, i see a recent ivy league grad who does the same thing for extra cash on the side. met her through craigslist and yes, i’ve verified that she really did go to the school she says she went to. just because somebody goes to an ivy league college really has nothing to do with whether or not they’d ever do this kind of thing.
March 7th, 2008 at 12:28 pm
she might know how to multiply by 1.5 and 2, but do the johns? And anyways, some prostitutes give discounts for longer time periods.
March 7th, 2008 at 1:37 pm
Penn has criminology classes? (and 200 people are in them?) Jesus, what kind of community college outfit is that place?
March 7th, 2008 at 4:30 pm
Yale has basically has one as well, but it is taught as a psychology class
March 7th, 2008 at 4:48 pm
Er, goes to Wharton? Hello, Capitalism? Goes to an Ivy = worth more money, a premise everybody accepts… why not in this case too?
(I believe the Freakonomics guy has a riff on that, something along the lines the prostitution only sucks if you’re not getting paid enough)
March 7th, 2008 at 10:11 pm
Oh, come on. You’re worried about spam? Sign up a fake account… get a free yahoo/hotmail account and use it just for this. Where’s your investigative skill?
If they charge money, want a real credit card (as “age verification”) or something like that, I understand. But if not, you need to get back to work and read the reviews.
Though I have to say that I found the “charges admission” line quite witty.
March 7th, 2008 at 10:59 pm
OK. Can’t say I’m proud of this, but I do know why she quotes the different times. You don’t really buy a set amount of time when you get a prostitute. Rather, the times are sort-of an understood code for what goes on for the money. 1/2 hour is a handjob or bj, 1 hour is sex. I’ve gotta assume 1.5 hour is sex + bj and 2 hours must be some more sketchy shit (role playing or anal). So the fact that the charges are linear wrt “time” is, imho, actually surprising. It shows she at least knows something about fixed costs of deployment to a client, however. And the morals are straight-up Wharton. (I’d know.)
March 7th, 2008 at 11:34 pm
she could stand to lose a few pounds
March 8th, 2008 at 11:59 pm
My roommate, who is an expert in waist and bra sizes – in fact, in women’s sizes in general – says that this girl looks more like a 28″ waist. He thinks 5′1 girls should be under 100 lbs if they want to be thin. Maybe she wrote down her measurements and the 3 looked like an 8. That being said, she is pretty hot. I wonder if she will come to Princeton?
March 9th, 2008 at 3:17 am
Wait, so you’re telling me that having a girl who will give you a girlfriend experience is worth spending money on? Seriously, put on a polo shirt, get yourself an Ivy pass, do a few shots, and get the same skank experience for free.
March 9th, 2008 at 5:54 pm
http://yourexoticcourtesan.com/images/127.JPG
Do I see her kitty a la Lohan & Spears?
March 11th, 2008 at 8:22 am
are you serious? She doesn’t need to lose any weight…unless anorexia is your bag, then you should get some help…
March 11th, 2008 at 6:39 pm
i am serious. click on the link and look at her belly. it sticks out.
March 11th, 2008 at 7:03 pm
i am serious. click on the link and look at her belly. it sticks out.
March 11th, 2008 at 7:26 pm
So… d09, are you trying to say that she’s not quite Elliot Spitzer material?
March 11th, 2008 at 9:26 pm
i wont even try to understand spitzer. he’s got a hot wife, and if he was really that desperate, he could have just pulled a clinton.
March 16th, 2008 at 11:29 pm
Spitzer went to Princeton–as did Rumsfeld and everyone’s favorte ant-semitic Versailles-ruiner, Woodrow Wilson.
I think a compelling case can be made to ban Princeton graduates from public service. And then maybe we can put them in little ghettoes.
March 17th, 2008 at 11:43 am
Agreed, Wilson’s implementation of social welfare/reconstruction and his naive belief in international law smacks of stupidity.
March 18th, 2008 at 5:31 am
I’m not defending Wilson but what’s naive about international law? In this day and age of nuclear proliferation it seems pretty relevant to me.
March 27th, 2008 at 8:33 am
Prostitution is the worlds oldest profession. If you don’t like it stay out of it. If you are into then it should be yours to enjoy. Give the girl a break.
May 6th, 2008 at 12:08 pm
I have had the displeasure of actually knowing Solana Jewel, the “sheduler”. What she really is, a woman who looks to prey on others, both men and women for money, gifts, and cash. But let’s say what she actually is… She is a past her prime Filipino women who whored her self out. She is also a negligent mother to her daughter, who lives with her father thankfully. Solana’s name is Betsie Bo Rapada. Hopefully a day will come when she will find that she is accountable for pimping other women, exposing her child, spouse and family to her sexual perversions. She may be sexually addicted, but for gods sake the amount of self made porn and utter disregard for a little child being exposed to her lifestyle is shameful.
May 6th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
I have had the displeasure of actually knowing Solana Jewel, the “sheduler”. What she really is, a woman who looks to prey on others, both men and women for money, gifts, and cash. But let’s say what she actually is… She is a past her prime Filipino women who whored her self out. She is also a negligent mother to her daughter, who lives with her father thankfully. Solana’s name is Betsie Bo Rapada. Hopefully a day will come when she will find that she is accountable for pimping other women, exposing her child, spouse and family to her sexual perversions. She may be sexually addicted, but for gods sake the amount of self made porn and utter disregard for a little child being exposed to her lifestyle is shameful.
May 25th, 2009 at 10:35 am
Solana Jewel / Betsie Bo Rapada / Sloane Qates
They all are the same person. She is now using the name Sloane Qates to pimp herself out.
July 19th, 2009 at 1:11 am
Even though mobile porn is seeing tremendous growth, I still think that the US is about 5 years behind the rest of the world :/
August 8th, 2009 at 10:51 pm
No, darlings, Solana/Sloan’s real name is Carrie, an nyu marketing major. Skank of all skanks.