Ivy League Sex Columns Continue to Suck, Lick
Either Princeton kids are really prude, or the Daily Princetonian "Ask a Sexpert" column is a little out of touch. This week, Sexpert-penned by the safe-sex stalwarts over at the University Health Center's peer education program-moves beyond the standard condoms-and-consent partyline and enters the parallel universe where horny co-eds stash "finger cots" and "surgical gloves" in their bedside tables:
When engaging in anal-oral stimulation or oral sex with a woman, a dental dam is a great tool to protect against STIs. ... You can also cut a square out of a latex glove or use a piece of non-microwaveable Saran Wrap. The microwaveable kind has pores that allow STIs to be transmitted.
If you're engaging in manual stimulation with a partner and you have a cut on your finger or just want some extra protection, finger cots are like little condoms for your fingers. These can also be made from surgical gloves.
It would be easy to slam the Sexpert for its latex-coated irrelevance (does UHS provide surgical gloves, or do I just ask my doctor for an extra pair?). Instead, let us trace Sexpert's topos shift from bedroom to kitchen, a creative reimagining of sexual spaces, and a sadly unused pun on the word "eat." Which reminds us of this Sexpert gem, from last spring:
As with any sex toy, glass and silicone [anal] beads are best because they can be cleaned easily by boiling them or popping them in the dishwasher.
Forget the free condoms at UHS and the LGBT center. Sexually-active Princetonians ask, Where are the sextoy-friendly dishwashers on campus? And the shared kitchen cooperative enough to let its users keep their anal beads in the silverware drawer?
Answer: Dartmouth.
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October 19th, 2007 at 1:40 pm
One time, I found a “finger cot” in my Cosi bagel. That was fun. Ask Jim.
October 22nd, 2007 at 12:02 am
The UCLA sex column in the Daily Bruin was much better than what the ivies have offered as of yet. So sad; I expected to read heavy, sweaty bangin’ on the square or at the Yale house. So sad.
October 23rd, 2007 at 9:07 pm
Dental dams, gloves, and finger cots are important for preventing HPV. Who wants cancer? Not me!
Also gloves + lube = easier fisting.
Lots of schools give out gloves and dams at their sexual health facilities. I would be surprised if Princeton doesn’t. Actually, I’m surprised at your prudery/lack of sexual health knowledge, Ivygate. Are you not getting any?