How NOT to Ask Your Professor on a Date
Accidentally sent out to all of Princeton's ECO 100:
Dearest Prof Reinhardt,
I'm your fan from ECO 100! I heard you're going on OPRAH some time soon~ if you're not too busy, perhaps you can inform me of the time it's gonna be on air so that I can catch the show? Also, can I know if I can invite you for a meal, *like*, a date, in the hope that you would be glad to advise me on major stuffs? Feel free to reject me though.. understand you're busy prof! Thanks for your time~ and err, I hope you haven't been offended by the way I've written my email. I thought I need to devise a cool way to talk to cool professors.
Regards,
[name redacted]
Email – 
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September 27th, 2007 at 12:50 pm
Wow. I didn’t know that Princeton recently converted its facilities to a middle school.
September 27th, 2007 at 1:24 pm
$50 says the girl’s Asian
September 27th, 2007 at 1:28 pm
though we redacted the name, we also accidentally redacted the sex. it’s a boy!
September 27th, 2007 at 1:34 pm
big AS IF to Harvard. $100 says shes a caucasian eating club sorostitute
September 27th, 2007 at 1:36 pm
i’m very saddened to see that a princeton student writes so attrociously…to a professor, no less!
September 27th, 2007 at 1:38 pm
i think the girl is asian too. can’t quite put my finger on why i think that.
September 27th, 2007 at 1:49 pm
check out that nice wedding ring, lovingly displayed on those loooong fingers…and with his ferocious come-hither pose leaned back in the chair like that…now come on, who can resist a piece of that action??
September 27th, 2007 at 1:59 pm
“Thanks for your time~”
The ~ is primarily used by Asians. That plus the tone of the e-mail is reason enough to believe the sender is Asian.
September 27th, 2007 at 2:20 pm
another tipoff that it’s an asian sender is the incessant use of smilies like -_-;; and ^_^ and the omission of articles
September 27th, 2007 at 2:26 pm
at dartmouth, this is what we’d call a blitzjack.
that must have intentionally been sent to the class by a friend of the sender as a joke. i just cannot believe that someone at princeton would write an email like that to a professor.
September 27th, 2007 at 2:41 pm
“major stuffs”
September 27th, 2007 at 3:31 pm
yeah, definitely an asian. the tell tale ~ mark is all there. ha.
September 27th, 2007 at 3:37 pm
“Dearest Prof”??? Seriously? This has to be a joke. The only things that are missing are the hearts dotting his Is, unicorn stickers and two boxes (do you like me? check one).
September 27th, 2007 at 3:38 pm
d09, without divulging sensitive information, i can guarantee that this was not a joke that one of the sender’s friends played on him, and that just makes it all the more better
September 27th, 2007 at 3:56 pm
Was it actually a guy?
September 27th, 2007 at 4:51 pm
“Dearest”, “I’m your major fan from…”, “major stuffs”, and the overall tone make me also think this was written by an asian international student. Nobody who grew up speaking English would use such stilted language combined with a fawning respect for authority and trying to be hip.
Whoever it is, they would WORSHIP Casper the Great Dane!
September 27th, 2007 at 6:36 pm
yes, i am in the class and received the email as well…it is most definitely an asian male….no matter how much more creepy that makes it, its true.
September 27th, 2007 at 6:45 pm
Yes, it was a guy.
And a ‘09er sent a hilarious response to the e-mail…IvyGate should post that too.
September 27th, 2007 at 7:11 pm
it was definitely a joke, it followed directly after a girl sent a really toolish email to the whole class
September 27th, 2007 at 7:24 pm
He’s from Singapore, and as P’10 said the response was very funny.
wonder if prof. Reinhardt will reply-all…
September 27th, 2007 at 7:51 pm
Name redacted?? Aww c’mon, that’s no fun. I mean, after all, it IS sort of in the public domain.
September 27th, 2007 at 8:17 pm
could someone post the reply? if you remove the author’s name it should be no problem. thanks!
September 27th, 2007 at 8:42 pm
by popular request:
Dear [redacted],
While the students of ECO 100 surely appreciate and echo your heartfelt sentiments regarding our professor, we feel it is our duty to inform you that such obeisance is best reserved for the ears of Prof. Reinhardt alone.
Regretfully, the probability that Professor Reinhardt will consider going on a date with you is rather low, considering that he is married, heterosexual, and more than 40 years older than you. Furthermore, as you will no doubt discover during the course of your subsequent romantic forays at Princeton, public mailing lists are perhaps the only medium which is not commonly used for hooking up. More appropriate procedures might include helping him with his homework, walking with him after class, or simply taking him to the Street and getting him drunk.
Since this is one of the most important lessons you will learn at Princeton, perhaps it would be best if I illustrated this with an economics example:
Consider, if you will, the demand curve of Professor Reinhardt’s time, graphed between toolishness T and the quantity of students Q who are willing to engage in said toolishness. Thus, at the low end of the curve, we have the students who barely attend class, much less raise questions or come to office hours. At the high end of the curve, we have the Woody-Woo majors.
For the moment, ignore the fact that the supply curve in this model will not be strictly linear; since after a point, more toolishness will have a detrimental effect on Prof. Reinhardt’s supply of time.
Now consider what you have done by broadcasting this message to the entire class: now the students who used to be tools will be afraid to continue as such for fear of being compared to you. You have effectively placed a toolishness ceiling on our professor’s available time market! As we covered in today’s class, this will result in a shortage of Prof. Reinhardt’s time, and consequently our classmates will be unprepared for the final.
Reflect on this, and think carefully the next time you reply to a mailing list.
September 27th, 2007 at 11:42 pm
sincerely,
me
September 28th, 2007 at 7:28 am
With no sarcasm I admit redacting the name was a good choice. The story is just as funny but not nearly as harmful.
Who hasn’t had a crush on a dorky professor, of either gender, at college? Given this one is a bit extreme, but it’s all part of the experience!
September 29th, 2007 at 1:22 pm
the reply plus the original letter together has been forwarded so many times throughout the system now… It’s probably going to be one of those Princeton legends soon.
September 29th, 2007 at 2:00 pm
Why stereotype asian girls like that? How many asian girls do you know do this? You forget the blondes.
September 29th, 2007 at 9:30 pm
nobody said sending the letter was something an asian girl would do. people commented on the odd diction, grammar and punctuation as seeming asian (i.e. not asian-american). most assumed it was a woman (or girl, if you prefer) because the professor is male.
maybe you didn’t notice these oddities – since only the first sentence of your post is grammatically correct.
October 1st, 2007 at 11:19 am
the observation/comment from @anon87 is hilarious!
October 1st, 2007 at 2:23 pm
i saw the original, the sender was an asian male
October 1st, 2007 at 3:39 pm
the professor is wearing a wedding ring in that picture too… smart kid.
October 2nd, 2007 at 11:39 am
Having attended a Uwe Reinhardt talk or three, I can attest to his total charisma and gender-crossing appeal. After one Capitol Hill session, we waited around in the adoring throngs and got him to sign our Health Affairs…if we’d had the blind courage of a Princeton freshman, maybe we would’ve asked him to a meal, *like*, a date, too.
October 2nd, 2007 at 4:49 pm
That wedding ring doesn’t necessarily mean anything ;)
October 10th, 2007 at 1:46 am
To Aaron Schneider:
I’m in econ100 with you and a fellow 09′er, and while I’ve heard from lots of people that they thought your email was “totally hilarious”, I didn’t crack a smile once when I read it. You obviously spent a lame amount of time on it, just to publicly humiliate a freshman that in all likelihood, is lacking in social skills and the way we do things here in the US. It’s ironic that you accuse that boy of being toolish, when you response had to be the most toolish, douche-baggy thing I’ve ever read. Seriously though, it was really lame.
October 14th, 2007 at 8:40 pm
defintely was a douche thing to reply to the email and try to humiliate him as if it wasn’t already embarrassing enough
October 18th, 2007 at 1:08 pm
Dear Professor,
Do you want to be my boyfriend?
Yes No
_________ __________
Love, Savannah
October 19th, 2007 at 10:41 am
definitely a bunch of fuckin racists in the room, enjoy your stays in hell you crackers
October 19th, 2007 at 10:42 am
definitely a bunch of fuckin racists in the room, enjoy your stays in hell you crackers
November 1st, 2007 at 4:10 am
You should have politely rejected the student instead of publishing his/her email on the internet. It is unprofessional and frankly cruel. As anyone who’s ever been infatuated knows, a person is not always rational when under the influence of such emotions. The individual may otherwise be an intelligent and respect worthy individual.
November 7th, 2007 at 5:49 pm
Aaron,
“ignore the fact that the supply curve in this model will not be strictly linear; since after a point, more toolishness will have a detrimental effect on Prof. Reinhardt’s supply of time.”
“Strictly linear” should be replaced by “strictly increasing.”
November 28th, 2007 at 4:14 pm
These ppl aren’t really being racist; I am in this class and I also have another class with this kid and he really IS an Asian int’l student.
October 6th, 2008 at 8:48 am
i saw the original, the sender was an asian male