Alright, We’re Just Gonna Say It: He’s the New Kaavya
Can someone please get this man a sitcom?
Clearly, Aleksey Vayner deserves it. In the four days since we (cough exclusively! cough) posted the video the Yale senior commissioned of himself and attached to some i-banking applications, dozens of people have shared their Aleksey stories with us. And more often than not, they're stories he told them -- which is why we don't feel bad about all the attention we're heaping on this fabulist. (Fake business, fake charity, fake book -- sympathy kinda evaporates, don't it?)
All day long, the tips kept getting better. We can only share a few here -- but we suspect this spring will never run dry.
- The writing sample Aleksey attached to his i-bank applications appears to be at least partially plagiarized from this source (which, weirdly, he quotes earlier in the piece). Search on "hidden beta exposure" in both articles.
- A member of the Yale tennis team wrote in to dispute Aleksey's claim that he competed on the Satellite tour: "I played for Yale tennis, and he tried to walk on the team. He got cut the second day. I had one conversation with him, and he claimed to have KILLED 24 people in the caves of Tibet."
(Other great comments: "I too played for Yale tennis, and Vayner/Garber claimed that he has trouble flying on planes because he has to register his hands as lethal weapons each time he goes to an airport." And: "The giveaway on the investment firm was that he said his firm specialized in "risk-aDverse" strategies. The other giveaway was that he's fucking crazy.")
- We decided to not be too scared of the cease and desist letter Aleksey emailed us, given that he copied and pasted it from the first Google hit for "cease and desist letter," right down to the "very truly yours" signoff. Attorney Ron706@aol.com, Esq., really earned his fee there.
- At Yale, Aleksey has offered to treat sports injuries using various "Eastern" therapy methods, including massage and acupuncture. Before "treating" a "patient," he sent them this letter. You simply have to read it in full. Somewhere in there he claims that his brother is "head of pediatrics at Columbian Presbyterian hospital in NYC." A search on the Columbia Presbyterian Physician Network turns up no one with the last name "Garber" or "Vayner." But our favorite part is this line: "I am not certified in any Western sense of the word, neither in Chinese medicine, Tui-Na, Shaolin trauma medicine, nor in acupuncture, all of which I practice extensively never-the-less."
- And, um, not quite so humorously, the SEC and dean of Yale College have been notified of Aleksey's transgressions.
God, what theater. You cannot make this shit up. Unless, y'know, you're Aleksey.
Bonus: The Yale Daily News joins the fracas. Money line: "Among the claims [a dance teammate] said she has heard is one that Vayner is one of four people in the state of Connecticut qualified to handle nuclear waste."
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October 10th, 2006 at 9:34 am
Once upon a Senior Yalie, with morals none and skin quite scaly
Came an idea of self promotion grandiose.
With a change of name from Garber to Vayner, quoth the youth: “What could be plainer?”
“I’m meant to rule the world on twinkletoes!”
With tales of deeds both dark and strange, he stalked Yale’s campus like the mange
That plagues the hide of ordinary curs.
His hedge fund? Phony. His dance partner? Bony.
And from here the tale gets even worse.
He showed he can bench all 4 of The Wiggles, and all of Wall Street got the giggles
At his inflated claims and plagiarized typos.
But Aleksey cried: “You must desist and also cease! I am truly a magnificent beast!
And I backed into those steroid-filled hypos!”
Alex, baby, some advice: Nice to be important? More important to be nice.
Don’t plagiarize books about women in the Holocaust.
No one cares if you have hands of death or even killed folks in Tibet;
Lying about it makes you look like the ass end of a horse.
Profiteering on a fake charity for kids makes decent people flip their lids
And want to ride you out of town upon a rail.
And if you’ve been investing since the ripe old age of 12, the good news is that your future isn’t shelved
Because you’ll have enough to post your bail.
Instead of embarking to the world of I-banking, you now will get an overdue spanking
Like Willy Wonka’s own Veruca Salt.
Lest ye cast around for blame, focus on one of your several names,
And check a mirror; it’s your own damn fault.
October 10th, 2006 at 9:48 am
This dude is like the Yale version of Christian Bailey of the Lincoln Group… who went to Oxford, changed his name, claims to know all kinds of stuff about finance, and has now made millions by ripping off American taxpayers by winning huge contracts for his company in Iraq. Oh yeah, and he lied on his resume and made up some fake investment firms, too. http://www.sourcewatch.org/index.php?title=Christian_Bailey
October 10th, 2006 at 10:50 am
“I too played for Yale tennis, and Vayner/Garber claimed that he has trouble flying on planes because he has to register his hands as lethal weapons each time he goes to an airport.”
Sounds like he’s channeling a little Chuck Norris
October 10th, 2006 at 11:30 am
Aleksey Vayner’s town was blown up in a secret A-Bomb test. The only survivor? Aleksey Vayner.
October 10th, 2006 at 11:43 am
oh guys, no way. aleksey’s facebook page is insane. in his photo album, he has a picture of himself shaking hands with pete sampras and claiming that the score was 6-1, 6-1 (sampras won) and that “the ones i got were me serving.”
and his girlfriend just graduated from high school.
unfortunately, i know another guy very similar to aleksey who lies about EVERYTHING…starring in RENT on broadway, writing and directing a film being produced by lionsgate, etc.
very disturbing that there’s another on like him out there.
October 10th, 2006 at 12:44 pm
Today in Aleksey Vayner: Everyone Hating On Aleksey
It’s all plagiarism, publicity and murder today in Aleksey Vayner. Gawker and IvyGate are full up with reader emails about the young man. He’s made it into the mainstream media–not just the New York Sun. Our favorite comment comes from…
October 10th, 2006 at 1:29 pm
Thom413, please tell me you have a book/blog/online column because you are freakin’ brilliant.
October 10th, 2006 at 1:31 pm
beebopwhee: Can you post a screenshot of his Facebook page?
Hmm. This quote in the Yale Daily makes me feel a bit bad for him. Maybe he IS like Russel Crowe (er, John Nash).
October 10th, 2006 at 1:46 pm
Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn’t have to do it himself. The easiest way to live your life…just ask Christian Bailey
October 10th, 2006 at 2:00 pm
I read about this guy on fark.com. Please someone keep the updates coming about this guy. There is no way this person is still at Yale. Say it ain’t so! Aleksey is like a train wreck, but I want to feel some sort of symphathy for him only I can’t.
Lies will always catch up with you. Lying about writing a book on the Holocaust is a one of the lowest things I have ever read about.
October 10th, 2006 at 2:18 pm
Hmmmm, Charity Navigator, the SEC, the Jewish Anti-Defamation League, the ATP, Yale’s discipline board, the Attorney General of every state he possibly received funds from on his web-site, Harrison Ford, Sarah Michelle Gellar, the Dalai Lama, Pete Sampras…Is there anyone else this kid is going to owe money or jail time to?
October 10th, 2006 at 2:33 pm
Thanks Nate – I’m over at livejournal, same name.
October 10th, 2006 at 2:46 pm
I’ve loved reading about this guy for the past few days, but I have to say my favorite bit was reading in the YDN that he “gave tennis lessons to Harrison Ford and Sarah Michelle Gellar.” Classic!
October 10th, 2006 at 2:55 pm
Will someone look into this deviant personality-type. I unfortunately have one of these pathlogical liars in my life and I need more info. Thanks.
October 10th, 2006 at 3:52 pm
We had a guy like this at Yale when I was there in the early ’80s. Back then, the imposter was “named” Shawkut Ahmed Mohammed Aziz ibn Saud. He claimed he was a prince. For dinner, he’d hire a limo for a ride to NYC. Eventually people wanted to him to pay his tabs.
He went on a date with Brooke Shields down at Princeton and broke his nose playing cricket.
Turned out he was a Mexican-American and AWOL from the Army. Good times!
October 10th, 2006 at 3:52 pm
He may not be certified at this point, but he’s obviously certifiable.
October 10th, 2006 at 3:59 pm
this guy seriously needs to get some help, that’s all i can say. there’re some REALLY crazy/deluded people out there.
how the hell did he get into Yale?!?!? by sending in another ‘Impossible is Nothing’ footage? what is wrong with Yale admissions?!?!?
October 10th, 2006 at 4:05 pm
a couple guys like this at columbia. hell, I bet every ivy league class has one or two.
October 10th, 2006 at 4:06 pm
there’s probably nothing he wouldn’t like more than this attention.
October 10th, 2006 at 4:25 pm
Ummm…he attributes the hidden beta exposure paragraph to Bruce Britten of PIMCO. That hardly qualifies as plagiarism if he’s giving a citation. That’s called a “quotation”, and is a reasonable fair use in a researched article. It’s even in quotation marks! I think you’re overblowing this guy just a tad. What, did he cockblock you at a party or something?
October 10th, 2006 at 4:29 pm
Just some interesting info on him. Though he started out as class of ‘06 and now is class of ‘07, the Yale roster lists him as class of ‘08 now.
Did he flunk out another year?
October 10th, 2006 at 4:47 pm
I think Gwen needs to understand that no matter how many “” you have in your article…it can stil be considered plagiarism if you don’t have enough of your own thoughts. It doesn’t matter if this guy is innocent of being a plagiarist…he’s still a douchebag. The shit that he pulled and the stories that he told are obviuos signs of a lonely loser that has no future except at the end of his mother’s tit. Gwen must be his little fuck-buddy and misses his Knight in Aluminum Armor.
October 10th, 2006 at 4:49 pm
True story: So as not to be distracted from finally successfully developing the cure for all types of cancer, which cure will soon be presented to an astonished and grateful medical community, Aleksey’s penis detached itself and serviced all one hundred and fifty seven of Aleksey’s girlfriends ON THE SAME NIGHT.
October 10th, 2006 at 5:06 pm
When Aleksey was a child, he was part of a secret soviet program on humans in a vacuum. He was the only one to survive five minutes without a space suit in deep orbit.
October 10th, 2006 at 5:20 pm
One person whom I knew for a brief period acted like this fashion and was diagnosed as bipolar disorder.
October 10th, 2006 at 5:42 pm
Gawker has his Facebook page:
http://www.gawker.com/news/aleksey-vayner/secretly-sensitive-douchebag-likes-dancing-the-matrix-206612.php
October 10th, 2006 at 7:31 pm
He also talked to Elvis the other day.
October 10th, 2006 at 8:26 pm
This is all terribly sad. I knew a guy freshman year who claimed to have been a member of the US Olympic fencing team, a B2 bomber pilot, Harvard professor and Kennedy family member. He dropped out prior to sophomore year. How has this one navigated through Yale on similar behavior?
October 10th, 2006 at 8:37 pm
Donny Deutsch will give him a job:
http://video.msn.com/v/us/msnbc.htm?g=e1d8ef1f-3fbf-4c78-8535-24a9c6377173&f=00&fg=copy
October 10th, 2006 at 8:50 pm
SHOOT THE VIDEO GOT REMOVED!
October 10th, 2006 at 10:03 pm
I met this kid once and he is currently a senior at Yale. He told me and some of my friends all of the above b.s. with regard to the charity, book, investment firm, etc. However, he ALSO claimed to be double majoring AND attending the Yale School of Management. He said that he was taking a total of 5 years for the joint undergrad and MBA degrees (which now, from reading this site, I’ve learned he’s taking 5 years because he flunked out a semester). When asked how he could be attending the School of Management at the same time (I’d never heard of this arrangement at Yale), he said that he had threatened to sue Yale for the “opportunity cost” that two years in business school post-college would have cost him (considering his highly successful investment banking firm).
Also, he said he planned to retire at some ridiculous age like 26.
This guy really seems like a pathological liar. The sad part is that my friends and I, though we thought the accomplishments were a bit much, were willing to give him the benefit of the doubt, as many Yalies (and other Ivy Leaguers) do accomplish some pretty amazing things prior to entering college. In my defense, however, I will say that he did NOT break out any of the Tibetan monastery/modeling/teaching tennis to Harrison Ford crap, so no red flags were immediately raised.
Finally, I will say that he is the most arrogant, self-absorbed prick I’ve ever met and that he deserves every ounce of the ridicule and punishment that is coming his way.
If Yale doesn’t act on this, I will value my degree SO MUCH LESS!!!
October 10th, 2006 at 11:06 pm
Donny Deutsch on MSNBC’s Rita Cosby said that Vayner was creative and smart by posting his own video on Youtube. I think you at Ivygate need to write Donny Deutsch and tell him what is really going on.
October 10th, 2006 at 11:14 pm
Donny Deutsch on MSNBC’s Rita Cosby said that Vayner was creative and smart by posting his own video on Youtube. I think you at Ivygate need to write Donny Deutsch and tell him what is really going on.
October 10th, 2006 at 11:34 pm
I am DEFINITELY NOT going to consider moving myself all the way from Australia to attend an Ivy League college with alumni of this nature.
I mean, I’ve heard some porkies in my time from people with a deluded sense of self importance but this guy is simply beyond help. If anyone like this guy tried to suggest to me some of the things he has stated, I would tell them to F*#K off. He has a “Capital management firm advising on risk aDverse strategies”?. What sort of Yalie (or half-witted college student for that matter) would use such language? How in the blazers did he get into Yale?
October 10th, 2006 at 11:55 pm
talk about having delusions of grandeur. but seriously, i feel sorry for him. he seems intelligent and motivated otherwise. i think what he needs more than ridicule is psychiatric help.
October 11th, 2006 at 3:08 am
To Ivygate, Please publish the names of the people at those top-class investment firms who forwarded Mr. Vayner’s info to you and start a slander campaign against them. They deserve it just as much as he does. Who’s with me?
October 11th, 2006 at 3:10 am
Someone very very close to the source must have sent you the cover letter and resume, come on, publish the name of that person at UBS or wherever. It will be fun.
October 11th, 2006 at 4:30 am
I dont know if this guy belongs on wall street, but he definitely belongs on TV. I read this whole blog just now, and he clearly has talent. And i dont think he had any mal intent because i think a 10yo could see it all as fake. I think a real fraudster would know that losing 6-1 does not mean holding your serve. And there are numerous other examples, only an uptight nerd would take that seriously. Of course the talent is in how he presents himself irl, probably with a subtle smirk. Btw his last name is the same as that of famous soviet writers-brothers weiner, though i looked up and they wrote books/movies about policework, not comedy. But his stunt is best characterized by the book “12 chairs” or any other book “zolotoi telenok” by Ilf&Petrov. All of those were made into great Soviet movies. I think people in Russia would be greatly impressed if they read all of your comments. There havent been many good comedies in Russia as of late.
October 11th, 2006 at 6:02 am
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=yale+rule
October 11th, 2006 at 8:04 am
Vayner’s tears cause cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
October 11th, 2006 at 1:13 pm
To the fan from Russia,
This all would be incredibly funny were it not for the fact that Vayner/Garber had committed actual crimes like slander, libel, and fraud in relation to his public claims, use of trademarks, fraudulent solicitation of funds, possible SEC violations, copyright infringement, and according to Gawker, delinquency of minors. The kid is probably going to jail if anyone besides bloggers are looking at this, and given Russia’s jails, I doubt the Russian people will be impressed by an idiot who’s pranks land him there.
October 11th, 2006 at 2:03 pm
I may have found a possible brother of his. Considering that their real name is Garber, I found on http://web.mlsnet.com/about/league.jsp?section=league&content=officials this MLS (soccer) commissioner, Don Garber, who is also a member of the board of directors at the Columbia Presbyterian hospital. But this guy is no doctor, he’s a business and journalism graduate. What do you guys think?
October 11th, 2006 at 2:27 pm
I graduated from Yale last May. I hope they look into his admissions files to see if he misrepresented anything in there. It’s a long shot, I know, but if that’s the case then Yale should have no qualms about rescinding his admission and having him expelled. He is tarnishing Yale’s good image.
October 11th, 2006 at 2:47 pm
His favorite music, according to his Facebook profile, is “Secret Healing Chants of Tibet.”
October 11th, 2006 at 3:00 pm
After further researching, I don’t think this Don Garber has anything to do with this Aleksis clown. It was just a coincidence of last names and Don being a member of the Columbia Pres. Hospital.
October 11th, 2006 at 3:03 pm
He might have met with the Dalai Lama just as I met the Pope in the Vatican. He was on his balcony on St.Peter’s Square, and I was with the thousands in the crowd. :-)
October 11th, 2006 at 4:24 pm
His “charity” coincidentally has the same name like this legit organization http://www.yespress.org/ .
God bless internet and Google!
October 11th, 2006 at 4:27 pm
His “charity” coincidentally has the same name like this legit organization http://www.yespress.org/ .
God bless internet and Google!
October 11th, 2006 at 4:45 pm
To Gwen re
Ummm…he attributes the hidden beta exposure paragraph to Bruce Britten of PIMCO. That hardly qualifies as plagiarism if he’s giving a citation. That’s called a “quotation”, and is a reasonable fair use in a researched article. It’s even in quotation marks! I think you’re overblowing this guy just a tad. What, did he cockblock you at a party or something?
His ENTIRE paper is plagiarized – follow the link provided above – he goes on to rip off the rest of that paper and others using ever very similar arguments. His only original thought is complete horse shit and fundamentally, not to mention statistically wrong!
And Gwen his cock is all yours….
Unbelievable that anyone would stick up for a fraudster that rips off children’s charities – you deserve him
October 11th, 2006 at 6:54 pm
http://alekseyvaynerfacts.blogspot.com/
For all late breaking facts.
October 12th, 2006 at 6:17 am
Can anyone expand on the story about killing 20 people with his bare hands in a Tibetan cave? Must have been a slow day in his otherwise hectic schedule. Cheers Aleksis – I haven’t laughed like this for ages..
October 13th, 2006 at 2:08 pm
YOU WILL ALL STOP MAKIN FUN OF ME!!!
YOU WILL STOP OR I WILL BENCH PRESS YOU THROUGH THE ROOF!
I WILL USE MY KUNG FOOY ON YOU…NO ONE CAN ESCAPE MY KUNG FOOY GRIP!!!
I hate all you guys…i’m gonna get some black ops guys I met while in the CIA to put a hit on you like my other freinds I used to work with in the russian Mob do!
I’m gonna kill you guys like I did all those Tibet guys!
YEA!!!!
And I’m gonna do it with
A BIG FUCKIN YALE DIPLOMA IN MY HAND!!
(and a book deal selling my sad story, and a lifetime movie of the month, a few Times on Sally, Montel and Oprah!! and I’m rich!!! laughing at the society that let this happen!)
Please…please please please…drive me to kill myself…dont ever let this rest….dont let society make me rich pulling the shit I have done
October 28th, 2006 at 5:29 pm
He’s certainly qualified to handle radioactive waste, look at that piece of
radioactive dog shit he calls a Resume.
I wouldn’t touch that without Tongs.
January 2nd, 2007 at 5:51 am
seems like a classic case of acute schizophrenia – pretending to be someone one isn’t, pretending to have things or abilities one hasn’t. I knew such a guy once, he was normal one week and shot completely through the roof the other, simptoms very similar (imaginary friends, KGB hitmen, surges of strength and potency, dishing out tips of 200-300%, complete absence of real-world connection, making active steps to become EMEA CEO of the tobacco company he worked for as analyst, trying to borrow money from friends to purchase a new car) luckily the shrinks were able to help him in time. I just keep wondering how Mr. Vayner/Garber kept unnoticed and unhelped for so long… poor fella, his brain seems to be totally out of town